George "Kitara Ravaché" Devolder Santos sprinted nervously away from a reporter in what were supposed to be slacks, but only looked like yoga leggings. dude's pants were so tight they had a whimpering zipper
by Uncle Joosie July 01, 2023
An adjective describing someone who is so fugly or slutty that no decent guy wants to fuck them.
Instead of pursuing the fugly/whorish person the guy 'zips up his Johnson' at all costs.
Instead of pursuing the fugly/whorish person the guy 'zips up his Johnson' at all costs.
Girl: 'Do you see that hoe making an ass out of herself? She is trying so hard but she's so ugly that no one will give her a chance.'
Other girl: 'Yeah, she's a total Johnny Zipper.'
Other girl: 'Yeah, she's a total Johnny Zipper.'
by NatiHemptress February 17, 2011
Slang for being be calm, relaxed, and ready to accomplish anything in front of them such as a stressful activity. This can be used after calming down after an emotional blow up.
After freaking out Allison took a deep breath and contained herself. Someone asked "Are you doing okay Allison?" to which she emphatically replied "I'm as cool as a zipper!"
by dantemac253 May 03, 2011
Example 1:
Nick: "How's the zipper struggle going?"
Matt: "Can't hook anybody on Tinder so it looks like it'll be a long time until I get laid."
Example 2:
Katie: "How are you and Lola doing lately?"
Caleb: "We're in a zipper struggle because I forgot to feed the cat on Monday."
Nick: "How's the zipper struggle going?"
Matt: "Can't hook anybody on Tinder so it looks like it'll be a long time until I get laid."
Example 2:
Katie: "How are you and Lola doing lately?"
Caleb: "We're in a zipper struggle because I forgot to feed the cat on Monday."
by porkchchoppanzeefin May 05, 2020
the most annoying fucking thing ever!! can't i just touch your dick without trying to work a complicated metallic mechanism meant for monkeys??
by yathiskidrox April 27, 2015
by zipper nickers September 13, 2011
by Dave720 June 04, 2013