Backseat Chess Player

Anyone (or even possibly a group) that stands over your shoulder while playing chess, and the person always claims to see an awesome move for either you or your opponent. This gets so annoying especially when you the moron says, "Oh you didn't see this awesome move!" Then points his fat finger on your board, or touches the pieces. They cause me slight stress due to their annoying hints for the person I am supposed to checkmate...or they keep saying in my ear like a slimy snake, "I see a good move." Sometimes their moves are good, but most of the time they have not a clue what they are talking about and can stick you in a worse situation or cost you a nice piece. Do not take advice from them, and if your opponent is a real chess player they will give them the bird and tell them to shut up or shove off. The best way to repel them is to just ignore them, or flat out tell them you can play better than they can and then prove it in a match.

Stop helping, damn backseat Chess Player.

by G.Stefani704 May 23, 2011

alabama rules chess

A variation of regular chess wherein whomever uses the white pieces win because they gang up on the black pieces, just like Alabama.

John: Dude, I hate playing chess with you. You only play Alabama rules chess and you never let me be the white pieces.
Dave: My pieces don't take kindly to your pieces 'round here, boy.

by Drupt May 7, 2007

extreme chess

Commonly played by drunken fraternity boys in the mid eighties, extreme chess has only become mainstream in the last 2-3 years. Every time you take an opponents piece, you are allowed one closed fisted hit anywhere on that opponents face, while remaining seated. Players must always alternate striking hands, and achieving a "check" allows for two blows. God forbid you shoule be worked into "check mate", because that attracts the afformentioned double blow, however from a standing position to inflict maximum degradation.

After having a few drinks with the lads..."Hey guys, lets have a game of extreme chess!!"....."Fuck that man, I'm not that drunk, lets play Russian Roulette instead"

by G-Train August 28, 2005

Human Chess

When you and a stranger Person A Are walking towards each other and When you are about 9 inches away you try to move out of the way. Once you move out the way, Person A also tries to move out the way and you guys almost collide but you dont and quickly go to the other side. Then SUPRISE person A also tries to move out the way. This can keep happening for seconds and even have a Stalemate.

Me: *walking*
Person A: *Walking*
Me: *Move to my left*
Person A: *move to his/her right*
Me: *move to my right*
Person A *Move to his/her left*

*Finally Over*
Me:I Fucking hate playing human chess

by KGtheBEAST June 9, 2009

dishwasher chess

When you place dirty dishes in somebodies dishwasher and they come and re-arrange them as soon as you have done it.

After dinner Karen cleared away the dishes and filled the dishwasher only to have Linda re-arrange them, challanging Karen to Dishwasher Chess.

by Spike Morrison November 8, 2009

Bitch Chess

noun; the arguement/disagreement and/or 'battle of will' between a guy and a girl, that ends up leading one or the other to want and lust for their partner.

Usually by saying things that aren't necessarily true, like admitting your wrong when your right, like setting up a pawn on the chess table. If you make the right strategic metaphorical moves, you'll end up saying "Check Mate Baby"

Bitch Chess is done via txt msgs the majority of the time.

girl:"I dont know if i want you to come over my house, my parents are home and i have alot of home work to do..."

guy:"Oh, thats ok, I can help you with your home work if you want or we can hang out some other time"

girl:"Ok, well actually why dont you just wait until i finish my homework, then i could stop by your place?"

guy:"Yeah, sure you can"

Check Mate.

girl:"Your such a fucking asshole you'll never change. Your the sorriest piece of shit i have ever seen"

guy:"Yeah? well screw you too bitch. I dont need your shit anyways."

girl:"Hahaha yeah right, You know your gonna miss this ass. Your pathetic. It's sad"

guy:"Yeah whatever, look leave me alone, i don't want shit to do with you, or your ass. Maybe when you can grow up and not act to immature we can talk again.."

3 WEEKS LATER

girl:"Hey, how have you been?"

guy:"pretty good how about you?

girl:"I've been ok. I was just seein if you wanted to hang out or something..."

guy:"Sure what do you wanna do?"

girl:"Idk, care if i come over in a little bit?"

guy:"Sure, if you would like to."

-------

guy2:"You still playin Bitch Chess with that one girl?

guy:"Yeah the final pawn fell into place earlier today lol."

guy2:"My manz."

Check Mate

by GFrock Da GenIuS February 5, 2010

Chat Chess

When talking to someone on chat (fb, skype, msn etc.) and they take forever to respond, and the pace of the chat resembles a game of chess.

You: Hey, how r u?

(Time passes)

Them: Good, yaself?

You: nb, how was work?

(A long time passes)

Them: Um, it was ok.

You: Ahuh...what you doing now?

(Again, time passes. They start typing. They delete it. They start again.)

You: WTF IS THIS, CHAT CHESS?!!!

by FreeRange April 6, 2011