bearded alice

A swamp-like creature, displaced from its natural habitat, dressed to blend in yet somehow not quite hitting the mark.
Frank: Has anyone seen Mark, looks like a bit of a bearded alice?
Keith: Yeah he was in the canteen a few minutes ago, nesting amongst the lasagne.
by Sharon_OzzHorn December 01, 2015
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Tek beard

A short-length beard with a thin line used to accentuate the jawline.
Ziad’s tek beard made his face look as though it was carved from granite.
by Notziad March 29, 2019
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shucking the bearded clam

The act of inserting ones fingers into the hairy vaginal orrifice of a female. Usually two to three fingers are inserted, although, depending on females' orrifice diameter, more fingers may be necessary. Normally fingers are held in a hook style position and rammed in and out at a pace intended to pleasure said female and aid her in becoming moist.
Jim and Eric where discussing the activities of the previous night.

Jim: Dude, that party was crazy last night! I

Know you were totally wasted. I saw you

disappear with that chick at like 3am.

You hit that son?
Eric: Yea dude it was awesome, i took her in

back room and smashed it. She was

ready to go after I got done shucking the bearded clam.

Jim: That's what's up man! So the puss was

nice and hairy Huh?
Eric: It was hairy, but I was too far gone to give

A fuck. I just needed to drain my balls.
by FairladyZ February 05, 2015
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D-beard

Short for "douche-beard." An asinine beard sported by somebody who is trying to be a hipster. Does not need to be worn by an actual douchebag but this generally helps in identification of the species. With the current infatuation with beards, the d-beard is becoming more prevalent.
Did you see that guy just walk in? Color Me Bad wants their d-beard back.
by FindingRachael October 10, 2015
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Ass beard

Person 1: I HAVE THE BIGGEST ASS BEARD OF THEM ALL!!!
Person 2: Think twice
Person 3: Only the REAL LEGENDS can grow the biggest ass beard, which is me.
Person 4: Could't you all just shut the f*ck up about these ass beards.
Person 4: But really, can you do this? *Grows beard so long that it grows stuck to his ass*
Person 1, 2, and 3: ...*walks away*
Person 4: ... Who's the real legend now!
by Aureole Youtube Channel February 26, 2019
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Beard Wax

Worn by pseudo-hipsters who are part of the the "...let's all be individualists and wear the same beard and haircut along with horned rim glasses if you need them..." crowd.
"Look there's another douche wearing beard wax, what are they clones?"
by JJJ2.0 October 17, 2018
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beard-wax

An anal male, preoccupied with his looks & perfect personal presentation shallow detached from the importance of real emotions anal up himself
“I was so upset but he just kept glancing at his reflection and preening. He’s utterly beard-wax””. Q: “Is the new boss an understanding type?” A: “Huh! No way. Totally beard-wax... snappy dresser, minimalist office, nil humanity”.
by Urban burble January 11, 2018
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