bearded alice

A swamp-like creature, displaced from its natural habitat, dressed to blend in yet somehow not quite hitting the mark.

Frank: Has anyone seen Mark, looks like a bit of a bearded alice?
Keith: Yeah he was in the canteen a few minutes ago, nesting amongst the lasagne.

by Sharon_OzzHorn March 7, 2016

Tek beard

A short-length beard with a thin line used to accentuate the jawline.

Ziad’s tek beard made his face look as though it was carved from granite.

by Notziad March 28, 2019

splitting the beard

When a female parts her vaginal lips either to piss or to have things inserted in her!

Tanya love splitting the beard when she went for a piss!!

by steven Dressel April 15, 2008

salted his beard

The act of tricking innocent homeless men into ejaculating various bodily fluids into a fake beard worn by the assailants.
the Beard is then dried, removed and dipped into cooking pots at a later date to add a matured salty taste.
Extra points are given if the contributors have different venereal diseases and Connor can milk them to satisfaction without waking them. Although consciousness is optional but not encouraged.

Did you taste Connor’s goulash last Friday night?? Tasted like he’s been salted his beard again. Anyways. My doctor says this gonorrhea around my mouth should clear up if I keep taking these antibiotics. But these genital warts are here to stay.

by JesusBummedTrump August 8, 2023

If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard

Da "parody on da cake-baking saying" remark dat you smilingly say to a cute chick whom you've unexpectedly met somewhere, and you are savoringly pressing her soft warm palms against yer fuzzy cheeks.

I always love joking around about, "If I'd known you were coming, I'd have shaved my beard" wif pretty girls whom I befriend; said humorous remark always gets da biggest amused giggle-fits outta dem.

by QuacksO October 22, 2023

lincoln beard

Shaving all of your ass and pubic hairs and super gluing them to someone's face.

Bro I totally gave this chick a Lincoln beard last night at the party when she passed out.

by Rezneck July 21, 2016

nare beard

When a person's nose hair is exceptional overgrown and densely protruding from the nose as to form a beard hanging from their nostrils.

John: I couldn't pay attention to what Mr Groso was saying, his nare beard was too distracting.
Sean: If he didn't stop talking I was going to grab him by his nare beard and drag him out of here.

by Pablo DePaco August 30, 2017