hillbilly turtle sex 

adjective:
1. The act of having turtle sex, hillbilly style.

2. A sexual position with the male crouching and the woman laying face down under a coffee table with her waist lifted slightly off the ground, while the man holds a wiffle ball bat used to whack the woman over the head whenever she pops it out from the opposite side of the table.

"Man, she was ugly as shit but I was fresh out of bags, so we just had hillbilly turtle sex instead. It's the best kind of hate sex, too! It turns out a wiffle ball bat leaves no marks. She won't admit it after the fact, but I know she liked it."

hillbilly turtle sex by SirDeity August 29, 2011

Double Turtle 

Double Turtle

When one is in the state of defecating, wipes their anus, yet after careful introspective investigation realizes they have not fulfilled their deficationary quest and releases a healthy portion of excrement on top of the wiping paper. The turtle being the excrement as it exits the bum hole, 2x excreting this turtle= double turtle

I took a hardcore double turtle whilst in the can

Double Turtle by Y33t October 24, 2014

Two Turtle Doves 

One of the dirtiest sexual acts possible.
If you know someone who is willing to partake in this, they are really, really dirty, and will literally do anything for you.

Man, she was so dirty, she even let me do two turtle doves.....

Two Turtle Doves by J4miem December 25, 2010

awkward turtle 

the act placing your hands flat on top of each other and moving your thumps in a circular motion, this is usually done when the room has fallen silent and every one is staring at each other awkwardly

Kate: So you wanna get freaky tonight?

John: No, Im gay...

"Silence"

John: Awkward turtle

awkward turtle by DancesNude March 8, 2011

ninja turtle

To clarify, there is a teenage mutant ninja turtle - a children's cartoon, and then there's "the ninja turtle". The ninja turtle is the act of taking your ballsack testicles included and flipping it around so that it sits on top of your johnson. It's best achieved on a warm day when things are hanging lose. The term originated at the University of MD fraternity scene. The ballsack resembles a turtle shell and the johnson is the turtle's head peeking out.

Jim was so drunk that he pulled down his pants and demonstrated the ninja turtle in an attempt to get Cindy's attention. But he failed miserably and went home and pulled his pud instead.

ninja turtle by Joe K from MD May 5, 2007

snap turtle punch 

A sweet sex position only the advanced can conquer.

"Baby, we just mastered the snap turtle punch. Damn, that was good!"

snap turtle punch by Kansas McGruff March 1, 2005

awkard turtle 

Awkard turtle is when your talking to someone and some very odd happens like if you asked someone out and theres a awkard pause thats it!!

You: Hay <insert his or her name>
Person:hows it going good looking
You: Great, Haye will you go out with me?
Long Pause
You: O shit awkard turtle

awkard turtle by Mothkilla March 6, 2009