dad?

The question you ask when your dad went out 2 hours ago and you can’t find him

Where’d you come from where’d you go where did you come from cotton eye joe

Dad?: you can’t find him anywhere he left becaus he doesn’t love you

by I_want_to_die_420 May 18, 2018

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Dad

The man who went to the store for some cigarettes and still hasn't come back

Billy: Mom when is dad coming home?
Mom: hes just gone to the store he'll be home soon...
Billy: But mom he hasn't come back in a 5 years

by Dad_come_home April 18, 2018

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dad

There are many types of dads

Type A: Serious, strict, and responsible

Type B: Likes golf and reading the funnies

Type C: Loser

Type A dad: We need to have a talk.

Type B dad: Fossils! Dun dun dun...

Type C dad: D'oh!

by frabrizio April 21, 2018

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Dad

A person who made you because he was using your mom for sex. Somebody who uses the excuse "her/his teenage hormones and attitude" to get you into trouble.

Kid: "Dad I don't want to walk to the pool today it's a 40 minute walk."
Dad: "Oh so you're getting lazy now?"
Kid: No dad I'm not getting lazy I just don't want to walk to the pool today"
Dad: "Oh so now you're talking back to me?! Give me your phone, you're not getting it for another week"
Kid: "But da-"
Dad: "NO EXCUSES! Maybe if you didn't give me that stupid teenage attitude you would have your phone."
Mom: "Is something going on?"
Dad: "No, your kid here just has a lot of teenage hormones."

by eeew October 29, 2017

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