absolute pussy

John michael

John michael is an absolute pussy, he didnt even wanna throw hands

by Poopy pants69420 May 6, 2020

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Absolute-slowness

The waitress who serves me in my local cafe suffers from absolute-slowness. It is usually characterised by having a big pale ugly face, no manners or respect and the general demeanour of having taken 67 valiums and a few bottles of vodka.

It should also be noted that those affected tend to move in slow motion so do not be alarmed this is normal as they are out of sync with our time-frame.

Customer 1: "Hello, I'd like a some soup please."
Waitress 1: "Ok it'll just be a second"

*goes away and grows the vegetables and grain and slaughters the cow herself*

Customer 1: "What the hell's up with the Absolute-slowness today!!"

by asteroth February 24, 2010

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Absolute speed

Absolute speed also known as maximum speed is a theory about how anything with mass moves through multiverse spaceat speeds faster than light which constantly increase. Due to lack of friction (because there is no atmosphere), gravity and changes in physics or lack of them this is possible. This theory also tells that everything travels with absolute speed not just light so we can say that everything travels as fast as light (since the speed of light also increases) or faster. Because this speed is constantly increasing we currently can't mesure it since we don't know the entry speed.

That piece of paper travels through the multiverse space at absolute speed.

by Yesverymuch December 18, 2018

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