by ass eater 420 February 27, 2020
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If you see her, run. If you talk to her, run. If her kid attacks you, expect to be in court. Just stay away from this beast of burden.
''C'mon Dorothy time for soccer practice!''
''Hey mom your a soccer mom''
''Yeah i know.''
''Cool.''
''Karen.''
'EXCUSE ME SWEETY , IS THAT HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER IM GOING TO TALK TO THE MANAGER ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE MISS.''
''Hey mom your a soccer mom''
''Yeah i know.''
''Cool.''
''Karen.''
'EXCUSE ME SWEETY , IS THAT HOW YOU SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER IM GOING TO TALK TO THE MANAGER ABOUT YOUR ATTITUDE MISS.''
by heretoraidanddestroy September 29, 2020
Get the Soccer Mom mug.If rumors are to be believed the single most disgusting thing to ever live on the face of the earth not only has she caused every single natural disaster up to this day, she has also managed to:
1. Cause every single war in the history of the world.
2. Contract several life threatening diseases, most of which can only be contracted from unprotected sex.
3. Kill of every species which currently resides on the extinct list.
4. Have sex with every single person who has ever been born since the proverbial downfall of the english language.
1. Cause every single war in the history of the world.
2. Contract several life threatening diseases, most of which can only be contracted from unprotected sex.
3. Kill of every species which currently resides on the extinct list.
4. Have sex with every single person who has ever been born since the proverbial downfall of the english language.
by Sandman47 November 10, 2011
Get the Your mom mug.A white suburban mom, from 25 to 50 who refers to her kids as her “Precious Little Angels”, and shields them from reality constantly. They are not allowed to watch any movies rated over PG-13, and they can fuckin forget about watching any R-rated movies. Also not allowed to play any games not rated E. Also not allowed to interact with “the wrong crowd”. This includes, but is not limited to, anyone who isn’t white, anyone who isn’t a fundamentalist Christian, and anyone who doesn’t believe in right-wing bullshit. Also she automatically assumes that anything that isn’t Christian is either atheist or Satanic. She drives a “safe” 45 in a 70 mile per hour zone in her massive minivan or SUV to protect her “Precious Little Angels”, who are still in rear-facing carseats at ages 10 and 12. Usually also a Karen. Will often call the police when something doesn’t go her way or to discipline kids other than her own, and more often than not the cops are on this bitch’s side. If you see her, RUN AWAY AND GET AS FAR AWAY FROM HER AS POSSIBLE.
Me: WHAT THE FUCK BITCH? YOU WERE DRIVING FUCKING 45 ON A FUCKING HIGHWAY!
Soccer Mom: YOU WILL NOT USE SUCH LANGUAGE AROUND MY PERFECT LITTLE ANGELS! MY KIDS ARE HONOR ROLL STUDENTS AND GO TO CHURCH!
Me: YOU THINK I GIVE A SHIT? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH REPAIRS ARE GOING TO FUCKING COST?
SM: LANGUAGE AGAIN! HEY, WHY ARE YOU DRIVING A PRIUS LIKE AN ATHEIST INSTEAD OF A MINIVAN, SUV, OR TRUCK LIKE A CHRISTIAN, YOU LIBERAL HEATHEN!
Me: WHY DOES THAT FUCKING MATTER? YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR THE DAMAGE TO MY CAR!
SM: YOU WILL NOT YELL AT ME! AND IS THAT GTA ON THE FRONT SEAT? VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES ARE THE REASON WE HAVE MASS SHOOTINGS AND SERIAL KILLERS! IM CALLING THE POLICE! (calls 911)
(The police arrived and put me at fault when it was this bitch’s fault. Thank God I have a dashcam.)
Soccer Mom: YOU WILL NOT USE SUCH LANGUAGE AROUND MY PERFECT LITTLE ANGELS! MY KIDS ARE HONOR ROLL STUDENTS AND GO TO CHURCH!
Me: YOU THINK I GIVE A SHIT? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH REPAIRS ARE GOING TO FUCKING COST?
SM: LANGUAGE AGAIN! HEY, WHY ARE YOU DRIVING A PRIUS LIKE AN ATHEIST INSTEAD OF A MINIVAN, SUV, OR TRUCK LIKE A CHRISTIAN, YOU LIBERAL HEATHEN!
Me: WHY DOES THAT FUCKING MATTER? YOU ARE GOING TO PAY FOR THE DAMAGE TO MY CAR!
SM: YOU WILL NOT YELL AT ME! AND IS THAT GTA ON THE FRONT SEAT? VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES ARE THE REASON WE HAVE MASS SHOOTINGS AND SERIAL KILLERS! IM CALLING THE POLICE! (calls 911)
(The police arrived and put me at fault when it was this bitch’s fault. Thank God I have a dashcam.)
by qw3r1y March 2, 2023
Get the Soccer Mom mug.A beige mom is a mother who only gives their child sad beige toys (usually wooden) along with sad beige clothing you may be wondering why do these mothers not give their children the joy of a bright colorful life well these mothers also live a sad beige life and go feral when something is out of their aesthetic
by iDontKnowWhatsGoingOn26 February 22, 2023
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