telephonic jihad

1) When someone brings a holywar to you as they can't talk to you in person. 2) When incompetent graduate students are afraid to talk to you in person so they call instead.

Mohammed brought a telephonic jihad to me this morning, wish he'd just come over

by Bubba-that guy February 11, 2010

telephone tough-guy

A person who talks big shit on the telephone but IRL is a huge pussy.

Unknown: "You're a bitch, you couldn't whip shit."
Jim: "What are you, some sort of telephone tough-guy?? Give me your address and I'll come kick your ass"
Unknown: *click*

by benguild August 28, 2014

Mexican Telephone

A string and 2 or more cans attached to the ends.

Lupe! Can you hear me? Yes, Pedro I can. Awesome! We successfully made a Mexican Telephone System!

by Pedro L. January 11, 2008

telephone

1) n. An antiquaited communication device with a handset for listening and speaking into, either directly connected by multi-strand wire or with a battery and transmitter to a base receiver, either type also tethered to the wall and connected to an external line out to the ethernet or phone system.
2) n. The defining communication method of the 20th century, connecting people around the planet, and ending isolation anywhere in the world.

Grandma, tell us about how you use to have a phone that was tied to the wall that you couldn't take anywhere.

by cunninglinguist May 16, 2005

telephoto

Telephoto is commonly referred to telephoto lenses (or tele), for SLRs and some point and shoot cameras. Telephoto lenses on SLRs could range from the mild 100mm to strong 600mm, or even 800-1600mm, with a teleconverter. Tele lenses tend to be very large, depending on how fast they are and thier focal length. Canon's L-series "white lenses" seen at sporting events are commonly f/2.8 for 400mm, or f/4 for 600mm (there are tons of focal lengths and apertures in between). Common optical problems that plague most teles are vignetting, barrel distortion, Pincushion distortion, and chromatic aberration (also known as purple fringing). Most telephoto lenses, and all fast ones, are very expensive. There are cheap ones out there, like the Nikkor 70-300 f/4-5.6G (which you could easily get for about $170). But if you want a pro quality paparazzi/sports style lens like Canon's 600mm f/4L IS USM, you'll have to invest a little under $9000.

Although expensive, telephoto lenses are really fun to shoot! Sell a kidney!

by Kodiac1 April 27, 2007

telephone call

One breast in the ear and one in the mouth

Making a telephone call. Similar to motor boating without the sound

by Loves2Poop December 2, 2013

Tabasco Telephone

The performance of covering the receiving end of a telephone with Tabasco sauce, then plowing it into your girlfriends anus. Then remove it, and call your parents.

Dude, I really want to give her a Tabasco Telephone. Yeah man that would be sweet.

by big old boner November 11, 2009