Scottish bagpipes

The 'pipes' layys on his/her back with their legs (arms optional) in the air and sphincter presenting. The 'piper' 'pipes' by kissing licking nibbling etc said presented sphincter whilst simultaneiusly reaching around a leg with one arm to fondle tweak wank etc 'pipes' genitalia. Pipe amazing grace for extra stimulation.

The Devo loved it when his girlfriend played the Scottish bagpipes after his team had won at footy.

by DevoMcbagpipes February 9, 2017

Scottish Regard

A fancy way of accepting someone's request to bid on your presence at an event.

Andy got a ton of bids for his presence at Operation Tofurkey but he only sent one Scottish Regard to that pederast Hanrahan.

by 2xDimes October 10, 2012

Scottish smokescreen

When a large, red-haired man - preferably Scottish in heritage - pretends to perform oral sex on a woman but only uses his fingers and makes licking noises with his mouth. Similar to Fake chow.

How come Doug's beard doesn't smell like poonanny after he eats out his girlfriend, Kittie everynight?

Easy. He gives her the old Scottish smokescreen

by Horis Bybrinski September 12, 2011

scottish people

superior to everyone especially English people. we are the best people to exist

person 1:omg I love scottish people
idiot 1: ew nah I hate them
person 1: kys

by stanlana March 15, 2022

The Scottish Army

When you're doing a girl, you suddenly yell "ACH" and have twenty friends run in wearing kilts and then gangbang her until you all jizz inside her.

From then on, you refer to her as "haggis"

Girl: Did you really give martha the Scottish Army the other day?
Guy:Who, Haggis? Yea that was pretty fun.
Girl: She's in the hospital.

by BTLighting February 22, 2011

Scottish hello

A way of greeting a good friend, whereby you put a hand on their shoulder, then shout 'Give us a kiss!' and headbutt them. Bonus points are awarded if completed without spilling your drink.

"Ow, Mac just gave me a Scottish hello. He nearly broke my nose."

by Greg April 26, 2005

Scottish Goodbye

Similar to the "Irish Goodbye", but distinctively Scottish wherein instead of simply disappearing without saying farewell, you actually play psychological warfare with your enemies and tell them you’re coming so they wait on you when you clearly had no intention of showing up.

Cody told Brandon he'd meet him at the hotel bar in 20 minutes.
Cody leaves to the airport.
Cody pulled a Scottish Goodbye on Brandon.
Get rekt Brandon.

by CamrenLuvsVulva July 17, 2019