One-upper

A one-upper who always has to be bigger or better than you. If your uncle has 20 ft. boat, his uncle or cousin has 21 ft. boat. A one-upper never loses in the world of story-telling.

Chris is a nice guy, but he's a big one-upper. He always follows my stories with a better one!

by MAP08 August 2, 2007

one upmanshit

A phenomenon that occasionally occurs in social gatherings that devolve into a nostalgia-fest conversation about fecal incidents such as soiling underwear, quality bowel movement and/or alcohol fueled defecating incidents. Inevitably, the conversation becomes a string of awful fish-stories about large bowel movements and creative placement and/or uses of them. The conversation becomes more and more repugnant at a exponential pace. Ultimately, the least attractive person of the coversation wins with the most horrifically grotesque story about his or her colon meat.

"...Last week, at Joe's bachelor party, Eric told us this story about crapping his pants on the way home from work that week. For some reason, the stripper decided she should become part of the conversation and told a story about how she once deuced through her g-string thereby cutting the turd in two. Eric rebutted by regaling us with a tale of a boat trip where he made some starboard diarrhea or something like that. That touched off about an hour of one upmanshit where each had one less appetizing story after the next...."

by JEUNT November 21, 2009

one-upper

If you have had a bad day, a one-upper has had the absolute worst day of their entire life and possibly the worst in recorded history. If you met a hot guy on vacation, the one-upper banged Brad Pitt on vacation. If your brother bought you a really cool new CD for your birthday, the one-upper’s brother is God. The one-upper is the most obnoxious and hateable person you have ever met, but they are probably proud that they have one-upped everyone else you ever thought you hated.

I found twenty dollars in the street the other day and I was feeling pretty lucky, until that accursed one-upper told everybody that on that very day he discovered Donald Trump was his uncle. God, I hate that guy.

by Megsi February 23, 2008

story interruptor one-upper adder-toer

A person that interrupts you mid-story. But then not only interrupts your story, they feel the need to one-up your story with an even better story of their own. And to top it off, they not only interrupt you in the first place, one-up you with their story, they then feel the need to add to your original story they interuppted.

I was in class the other day talking about how my dad went to Haiti to help the earthquake victims, and before I could even finish Frank interrupted me and said his dad not only flew to Haiti to help the victims, but that he also donated a million dollars to the relief act. He went on to say that his dad told him my dad was down there but wasn't actually doing anything to help. That fucking Frank is such a story interruptor one-upper adder-toer!

by krriley January 28, 2010

One Upper

That person who has to be better at everything. Even when they shouldn't want to.

"I remember once as a child I accidentally killed a squirrel."
"Aww that's nothin' bro. I used to kill animals all the time."
"Really?! What the hell is wrong with you freak?
"Oh you think you're disgusted in me? You should see how disgusted I am at me!"

A One Upper

by GroceryClerk March 2, 2016

one-upper

A one-upper is someone who always has to be bigger and better than everyone else. If you say you are drunk, they exclaim with how much more they have drank than you.

Although Matt may seem mediocre, he is actually a one-upper; He must always top your story with one of his own.

by Drew Workman January 3, 2008

Pathological One-upper

One-upping to such a degree, involving, caused by, or of the nature of a mental disease, where an upper is incapable of ever stopping and must refute any up of a fellow upper, even if the up makes no logical sense at all.

Regular One-upper: Dude, i bought a Jaguar last week. It's sick.
Pathological One-upper: Nice. I got an Aston a few days ago...
Regular One-upper: My Dad's getting a Bugatti Veyron today!
Pathological One-upper: That's nothing. For that much money you won't even get an apartment in my building. I have six.

by Wannaapppp! September 11, 2012