Double suicide jerk off

When masturbating, scream “MUM!” “DAD!” And try to blow your load before they enter the room, if you don’t do it in time you have to actually hang yourself.
Police 1: “How’d he go?”
Police2: “He attempted a double suicide jerk off.... And failed”
by EynonC December 22, 2019
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National Jerk Off Day

December 1st is a holiday for all the brave boys and men who fought through their urges throughout No Nut November! It’s a celebration of what they accomplished and what they will do during Destroy Dick December!
National Jerk Off Day is on December 1st! A celebration of what’s accomplished during No Nut November!!
by FlareHC October 18, 2019
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Jerk Off Before Donating

The process of masturbating before donating to female streamers or other content creators. Clearing one's mind, before wasting money on a thot.
Hey Mike, before you give that thot a dime you need to JOBD! Jerk off before donating!
by AsheronsFall July 02, 2019
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Jerk Off a Furry Day

On May 2nd you have to jerk off a furry.
I'm going to jerk off a furry on Jerk Off a Furry Day
by ijustateacheeseslice May 01, 2022
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jerk off drag race

When you are trying to get around at least 2 other idiots on the freeway and they seem content to go the same speed next to each other hindering your efforts to go around them.
Sorry I’m late. Got stuck behind a jerk off drag race on the way over.
by Kad357 November 10, 2019
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Jerk off a horse day

May 25th, run into an open field and give a horse a hand job, part of a religion called, "Cable", take off school, work, or whatever and jerk off a horse, or jerk it 5 times, either way.
John: yo why didn't you come into work the other day?
Marcus: oh it was national jerk off a horse day! It's part of my religion
by Cable-priest May 14, 2019
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National Jerk Off Day

December 23rd, national jerk off day. Go wank a quick one and get that dopamine rush!

Release it the day before Christmas Eve!
Phil: I don’t know what to do, I’m so bored
Ricco: Bro?! Don’t you know today is national jerk off day?
Phil: OMG! I must go to jerk off now. Thanks for telling me
Ricco: No problem man!
by SavvySpanishMan October 03, 2021
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