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petes' mom

Used as a substitute for Your Mom jokes. May be used by family members or close friends, when "Your Mom" would otherwise be inappropriate.
You have a little Dick! That's not what Petes' Mom said last night .
by TheRealBoterf9 October 31, 2017
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mom-jacking

When a mother either provides a backhanded sympathetic statement, or completely disregards your well-being because she has/ has had it worse than you.

Thereby completely hijacking the conversation towards her being a mom
Mom-jacking.

Me: I'm feeling so sick today

Her: oh, that's sucks lol. I remember feeling sick for 9 months, constantly throwing up, and had to be put on bed rest. Then had to go through 4 hours of labour.. but I hope you feel better soon!

Example 2.
Me: I'm feeling so exhausted lately, my Insomnia hasn't been letting me sleep.
Her: try having x amount of kids like I do, then try saying you're tired.
by NugLife08 November 20, 2017
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Mom flu

Like the regular flu, but nobody cares.
When Mom had the Mom flu, she still had to get the kids ready, drop the kids off, vacuum, so laundry, pick up the house, pick up the kids, take the kids to basketball practice, make dinner, set the table, clean up dinner, give the kids a bath, get the kids ready for bed, and tuck the kids in.
by Someonejuicy May 8, 2018
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Your mom

What you say when someone asks you what you're doing
Jeff:"hey, what you doing this weekend?"

Tim:"your mom!!!"
by Happykitty2012:3 June 11, 2016
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mom-tatorship

Mom-tatorship. noun. A form of dictatorship without the dick. A loving mother rules over her children, household and family with strict boundaries and clearly defined rules to ensure that everything is kept on the straight and narrow. Milk will be consumed with every meal for healthy teeth and bones. Veggies will be eaten in the correct proportion daily. Please and Thank You will be used frequently. And, of course, teeth are brushed twice a day. Sadly this is not the innocent 1950's where girls and boys are sparkling with intelligence, politeness and a decent work ethic. But, dammit, we are trying to better the world one kid at a time!
This is not a democracy. This is a mom-tatorship. As your mom-tator, I will instruct you how life will be and you will comply or else you will be grounded until you are thirty! Someday, when you have kids, you will thank me for this…..
by Mom-tator Supreme September 8, 2016
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squad mom

The friend that is always there and some how always possess snacks, water, or money to acquire the latter
The squad mom got us while we were chillin.
by BotMirage July 26, 2016
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ur mom

a joke that is very funny, unless you use it on someone who doesn’t have a mom..
Friend: what did you eat last night?
You: ur mom
Friend: . . my moms dead
You: oh sh-
by urmomishot November 20, 2021
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