Oriental Wank

This is the act of dressing ones self in a traditional chinese kimono, and self pleasuring using oriental sweet and sour noodles, while lying down on a rubber mat. At the same time, a small chinese woman sits in the corner trimming a bonsi tree.
"Yo paddy, how was the oriental wank?" "Tom it was very sensual. I even managed to get miss wong from the chinese to trim my bonsi after delivering my noodles"
by Blamblam25 August 30, 2018
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Muddy Wank

The act of using faeces as lubricant while masturbating.
John decided tonight was as good as any other for a muddy wank.
by WrongForLife August 29, 2019
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Wanking in the Bank

the use of credit to pretend you are more well-off than you really are.
In reference to your friend who has just bought an iphone depsite being heavily in debt, you would say he/she's 'wanking in the bank'.
by Andythesloth April 21, 2010
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Scream Wank

Masturbation where at the point of climax you give an unholy yell. Most likely completed when spouse/parent is not at home and you can scream your balls off in peace. Everyone's scream wank is different and unique. However, it often sounds like a mixture of pleasure and terror. Also called a screamer.
I was driving home one night and I felt the urge to pull over and have a wank, I left my wife in the car and walked away to tug under the bridge. The wank was going well but as i orgasmed i let out a large bellow that echoed throughout the area. I had scream wanked, where you scream at the point of climax. I got back to the car embarrassed and my wife uttered "What was that?" "That was a screamer" I replied with shame in my voice but joy in my eyes.
by joeking January 21, 2015
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Gypsy Wank

Masturbating with your hand covered in shit.
My mother was pleased to walk in on me whilst I was having a gypsy wank.
by Ryisheodheb August 01, 2017
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Wank stew

When you're so high and you green out while ejaculating and your cum looks and tastes like stew
Caolan got so zoinked that he had a wank stew
by Ruajohn February 12, 2019
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Wank cone

A random item or object that can be ejaculated into and can hold the sperm.
"Ah look , a can of coke ! That would make a great wank cone for today"

"Oh ! A ice lolly wrapper, what a great wank cone that will make"
by Can'tcopythis May 31, 2017
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