Turd Burglar

someone who snatches the turd out of the toilet before it hits the water while someone is pooping

I was pooping the other day and that guy turd burglar ed me.

by kamikazi282 January 15, 2009

titty turd

A piece of lint or fuzz found under a woman's titty

"Aww fuck i found titty turd this morning"

by tit fucker in backyard January 30, 2009

Turd Burglur

A random insult to annoy people. One who steals turds.

Fuck you! you ass-sniffin' turd burglur!

by MeowMixer October 9, 2004

turd hammer

a person or object that is as useful as using a turd to drive nails.

I was so drunk last night, I was a real turd hammer for driving home.

by Bill Wixby January 16, 2007

streak a turd

When your cat or dog attempts to dislodge a dingleberry by dragging their starfish butthole across the floor.

Hey man, what's your cat doing to the floor?

He took a soft shit so the little asshole has to streak a turd.

by deadbeatwriter March 8, 2014

Turd Pause

When you go to the bathroom to #1 and the other stall is occupied but dead silent upon your arrival, pausing their #2 flow so you do not hear the demonic things they are capable of.

Girl 1: I just went to the bathroom and all of a sudden Alexandra was silent while I went #1. It was weird that she just sat there and listened to me pee. I knew it was her because of her shoes.
Girl 2: Yo, you totally caused a turd pause.

by officeworklife July 26, 2015

turd of events

When the situation changes unexpectedly such that everything goes to shit.

When Trump got elected it was quite the turd of events.

by myactualrealname June 15, 2017