Mashed Potato Captain

The act of putting Mashed Potatoes in a Pastry Bag and squirting them into someone’s ass… Then having Anal sex and cumming in the ass. Putting a tube in said ass and sucking the cum and potatoes out!

I was with my girl last night and she made me a Mashed Potato Captain.

by Dumpeldore July 18, 2023

Raunchy Mashed Potatoes

What to call sex between two old people (30+) as the man is past his peak (rotten potatoes) and the woman is expired (rotten milk).

"Ew, I caught my grandparents doing the raunchy mashed potatoes!"

by raunchyrooster93 August 14, 2024

Mashing Potatoes

When your having sex with a girl and she squirts on your face then you throw up.

I was mashing potatoes last night then had to take a shower to wash the filth off .

by Doofenshmirtz1218 December 21, 2024

instant mashed potatoes

A vile, ungodly creation with no equal. The ultimate torture weapon of suburban mother's who don't like to peel potatoes or work late. A plague upon suburbia that leaves only hungry children and carnage in it's wake. A "food" dish from hell itself which can both lacerate the inside of your mouth with water-resistant flakes and also dribble out your mouth as you choke on it and beg for the gentle release of death. Generally, they're pretty terrible. Can be used to great effect in soups if you're allergic to flour though.

"Sweetie, I made instant mashed potatoes to go with dinner."
"Fuck you. I'm going out for Thai food. Eat that crap yourself."

by AC1919 December 30, 2016

Mashed Potato Muncher

A speccy bellend who eats mashed potatoes on a wednesday morning

you mashed potato muncher

by malarky5438 September 23, 2023

balls like mashed potatoes

Is a vivid and crude way of describing severe trauma or injury to someone's testicles (potatoes), implying they have been so badly crushed or damaged that they are no longer in their normal shape or condition. This expression is used to emphasize the extent of the injury and the extreme pain associated with it.

Guy 1: Fuck he crushed his nuts on the rail!
Guy 2: I bet he has balls like mashed potatoes now!

by DaveDH June 14, 2024

mashed potato baddie

A girl whose sole occupation consists of expertly mashing spuds day in and day out, turning the humble tuber into a work of culinary art!

Chef 1: "Who's on the mashed potato baddie duty tonight?"
Chef 2: "I did it yesterday, so it's your turn today!"
Chef 1: "Fair enough, I'll be the mashed potato baddie today and whip up a batch that'll have everyone begging for seconds."

by BeanieBenny February 16, 2024