Armchair captain

Someone who has 10,000 hours practice flying an armchair at a maximum flight ceiling of 0 feet above the ground, and who feels like they must never be distracted from their glorious mission of defending their front room. See also: lazy git

I have just been qualified as an armchair captain, but I can no longer feel my arse cheeks

by Armchair captain 1 June 26, 2024

armchair tourist

Someone who goes on holiday with just google street view

Oh, I've never actually been to New York, I'm just an armchair tourist

by Geyserburd November 7, 2023

armchair biologist

a person who only cares about biology when they wish to invalidate trans people … likely never engaged in biology class beyond that cheat sheet they made for their ninth grade final exam.

“These anti-trans bills are the latest wet dream of armchair biologists who love saying, ‘trans women are men’. Yes, we get it - you think we’re hot, and that scares you.”

by MotherStarling March 15, 2023

armchair defeatist

The average "smart" ass who assumes constraints loudly. These people are everywhere and only seem to ever come up with reasons why something won't work, or how it doesn't apply to them, and therefore must not apply to anyone else.

I didn't listen to all the armchair defeatists, instead I made a quick prototype and made $1,200 in my first month.

by batFalcon September 12, 2022

Armchair Crusader

Not to be confused with an Armchair Activist or Armchair Warrior, an Armchair Crusader is a person who would essentially die for another person unrelated to their life. Most often found in cult-of-personalities surrounding larger names, these people would blindly talk up about, defend, and proclaim falsehoods of counter-evidence towards a person's character, regardless of the relationship between the person and the crusader.
In essence, they would die for a person who doesn't even know they exist.

Any large YouTuber has a ton of these. Try insulting their character and see how many of them jump to his/her unneeded rescue!
Celebrities have many, or even just famed creators of great works (movies, video games, etc.)

ProclamationPatient said: Jesus Christ, Pewdiepie is the most annoying thing to ever entertain retards.

XxArmchaircrusedzer replied: HOW DARE U TALK ABOUT HIM LIKE THAT UR JUST JELOUS OF HIS FAME AND THAT HE HAS A FAN BASE LOL GO DIE PLZ

ProclamationPatient replied: You're the quintessence of my previous statement.

XxArmchaircrusadzer replied: HAHAHA JUST STOP UR OBV JUST AN HATER WHOES JELOUS OF HIM LOL UR AN IDIOT FOR NOT NOWING HOW TO ENJOY HIS GREAT CONTENT

(XxArmchaircrusadzer is an Armchair Crusader)

by D13pro March 12, 2014

armchair scholar

An armchair scholar is a person who thinks they are an expert on the subject after listening to one or two podcasts on the subject.

Don't tell me that climate change isn't real! How much research have you done? Don't be an armchair scholar!

by Siouxise Eileen October 2, 2023

Armchair Strategist

Refers to someone who gives "ideas" about how things should have been done differently, or needs to be done in a better way, but has neither the ability nor the knowledge that required to deal with the case, and has never been in a similar scenario and never experienced in the like. Resembles the proverb: "After the ship has sunk everyone knows how she might have been saved".

"The marine's caption heard a lot of armchair strategist after he failed the battle".

by Shipi June 25, 2018