Twitter

The place Donald Trump goes when he forgets he is the president.

Person 1:Did you see trumps tweet?
Person 2: Yeah, that guy make me not want to use Twitter.
Person 1&2: I hate trump.

by Lotus 2.0 April 2, 2020

Twitter

The space between the twat and the shitter.

I was all up in her twitter last night.

I followed that twitter all the way to Kansas.

by m.A.A.d Man July 9, 2014

Twitter

A website that suspends innocent people, but doesn't suspend pedophiles.

"If only twitter would suspend these pedos."
"Why would they? They actively support them."

by Suspend ProdigyFNRP on twitter September 23, 2020

Twitter

A place where weaklings can

a) ''Have their say'' for no one in their lives will listen to them
b) Feel closer to their idols (even though those idols couldn't give a rat's ass whether they live or die)

Cock womble: Log onto to twitter man!

Actual person: What?
Cock Womble: I wanna follow you.
Actual person:
Cock womble: Come on!!!
Actual person: I know people who listen to me and love me even when I talk shit. They're called friends. Not followers! Friends!!! And so I see no need to post my thoughts on a silly website where many people will just scroll up anyways subsequently making me feel like an insignificant spec on the horizon. FUCK YOU, YOUR TWITTER, AND EVERYONE IN YOUR HOUSEHOLD!!!
Cock womble: ...

by Zam89 January 21, 2015

Twitter

A waste of life

Sir Alex Ferguson: "Twitter is a waste of life"

by twastes February 3, 2014

Twitter

Where most girls find out their boyfriend is cheating

Where most girls stalk their crush/boyfriend

Girl 1: hey did you see Bob post a picture on twitter with Suzy on his lap?
Girl 2: oh god, Miley is going to flip!

by Thejanopig on twitter <3 February 17, 2014

Twitter

The name of the black hole at the center of the galaxy.

Scientists hypothesize that Twitter will suck in anything within it's reach

by dragonkeeper123 March 21, 2010