Jared

The biggest piece of bird shit out there. If you meet him, stay far away for your own safety.

Me:oh god its Jared
Jared:Hi
Me:Explodes*

by imRaymondg February 25, 2020

Jared

Noun: a person or people with the name Jared varying from short to tell hot and ugly straight and gay no real way to describe a Jared but weird

Guy: "I heard Jared hit his head on the ceiling while jumping"
Girl:"that's Jared alright"

by the real J July 22, 2011

Jared

Slang for a child molester. Came from Jared Fogle, that subway guy who ended up being a pedophile.

"Hey man, did you hear about that dude?"
"Yeah dude, he was a Jared."

by georgiasmalls January 10, 2016

Jared

Another name for Fagget/good Friend

Jared from Salinas California

by Kalaokalani April 26, 2008

Jared

A man or woman (no one really knows) whose hair smells of shit. He/She is very short and tends to have a high pitched voice. Jared sucks at sports so he/she resorts to drama. Jared sits at home all day and reads because he/she has no life.

Guy: Did you see that jared over there?
Other Guy: Yeah what a faggot. I hate him!

by WienerMaster3000 August 16, 2010

Jared

Jared; or one who plans poorly or has poor planning. Jared could also be described as ; (fake as fuck) or ; capable of doing things that could be described as huge

Hey man did you hear Jared planned that big thing then bailed. That was HUGE... What a bailmaster!

by Funktastic611 September 04, 2016

Jared

A real dick who abuses women physically and mentally. He also tells you to make him cum and he cums on FaceTime. Nice and shy in the beginning but makes you feel like a bitch In the end.

Jared is a fucking douchebag

by Bitch___ January 08, 2018