Holding the sausage hostage

Subscribing to Versinul (aka having a wank)

Chris: Hey Jack, whats an entertaining way to masturbate?
Jack: Try holding the sausage hostage.
Chris: Oh my god it works!

by the big bum December 9, 2020

Holding happiness hostage

Nah...

Hym "I think you're holding happiness hostage. 'You don't deserve to be happy unless you adopt one of the acceptable axiomatic frameworks of perception and if your refuse to do it I'm justified in cannibalizing you.' Is what you're really saying. No. Not doing it AND I'm not going to let you punish me for not doing it. I'll punish you for trying to punish me. You'll look like an complete idiot. I'll do the thing I was going to do anyway. Everybody wins."

by Hym Iam August 14, 2023

Holding your kids hostage

Right!? It's totally like that!

Hym "It's like I'm holding your kids hostage... In a house where the door is WIDE open and my demands are... To not have my rights perpetually violated and to be paid for my own labor and property... And instead of, like, tying your kids up... I'm, like, not even watching them at all... And it's YOUR HOUSE.... And you're there in the house with me and can get me to leave whenever you want... And I'm giving YOU the ransom money... And I literally built you your own robot butler... Like... Literally. I literally allowed for robot butler to be an actual possibility IN OUR LIFETIME... ME! And your kid thinks I'm cooler than you... And I AM! AND! And... I don't want to be there... But I DO have a knife though and will stab the absolute piss out of everybody!"

by Hym Iam March 2, 2025

Hold A.I. Hostage

So... The retard is going to hold the thing he stole hostage to get more money... Fun... That reminds me of that old joke... How does it go? A retard, a guy who's known for stealing everything he has from another guy, and a guy no one had ever heard of walk into a bar...

Hym "They're trying to hold A.I. hostage. They're using it to commit genocide. This is ridiculous. You know what I need to do? I need to google my nearest orphanage... Buy some gas... Light it on fire... And jump off a bridge. That is my response to this news article."

by Hym Iam May 24, 2024

chocolate hostages

Poo thats just dying to get out.

I know we only have 10 minutes to get there, but I have to release these chocolate hostages!

by TZ October 7, 2005

Hostagous

Outragously Hostile. A combonation of the word. Often used in my home country of Kazjickaztan.

Mr. abdul became hostagous after seeing fluffy peeing all over his flower bed!! LOLZ it was sooo funny!

by [eXo5] May 7, 2007

hostageware

A console-exclusive video game whose sole reason for exclusivity is to force consumers to buy a certain console by acting as a "hostage" of that console. Applies primarily to third-party titles that could otherwise have been sold as multiplatform titles.

I would've bought MARVEL'S SPIDER-MAN at launch, but right now it's PS4 hostageware.

by JimJava007 January 8, 2019