messy turtle

when a guy shits into a girls vaginal orface for sexual pleasure.

everything was going fine until alfredo thought he was slick and pulled a messy turtle. we had to postpone orgasm for a half an hour due to cleaning problems.

by nick March 14, 2004

Turtle Tickler

The act of finger fucking a girl, while moving your fingers around and making goofy doodle noises in a high pitched voice.

Tyler gave me the best Turtle Tickler Ive ever had in my LIFE!

by Jedi Master Yoda May 2, 2007

Licking The Turtle

When someone ejaculates up someone else's ass, then waits for that person to take a shit, waits for them to get a turtlehead (bit of shit hanging out their ass) then proceeds to lick the come off the shit.

"I really fancy licking your turtle"
"I dont know how to do it"
"on't worry with me you'll be just fine....no bend over..."

by Robert Lewis March 11, 2005

turtle cock

Slang for beef jerky

I need to swing into 7/11 and grab a turtle cock and a coke.

by Odinsworn December 20, 2006

Anti-Turtle

The act of consuming an alcoholic beverage while doing doggy style, without the consenting partners knowledge.

Lachlan: I was shagging this woman, and I suddenly felt unbelievably parched.
Thomas(50/50): Holy crap, what did you do?
Lachlan: Ripped into doggy style and flopped out for the anti-turtle.
Thomas: Nice, came up for some liquid
Lachlan: Indeed, best lager ever!

by Joseph OsBeel McDavey August 11, 2008

turtle tracks

To make turtle tracks = to leave.

I'm bored... let's make turtle tracks.

by sam harris July 6, 2005

douche turtle

1. A rare breed of turtle that breeds in Australia, Canada, and Iran.

2. A stupid fangirl

3. A song by " My Trans Alaskan Railroad of Siberian Tragedies in modern cities across the globe" Full song title : Make Love to Me Hard and Fast (Douche Turtle)

Johnny, go feed your douche turtle!

God slut, stop being such a douche turtle

I totally rocked out to douche turtle all night.

by Stunna Shades INC January 20, 2008