gramp wank

masturbation session that goes on for so long that all enjoyment and horniness is eventually lost

Yeah I got home after ten JD and coke and had me a gramp wank

by userpthat December 5, 2016

Dommy Wank

A Dommy Wank is a form of masturbation, commonly used by teenage boys. This is done by putting a condom on your shaft, and tossing one off. They provide an incredible sensation when creaming, but they can be pretty messy. Kibria has no dommy’s.🤏

See ya later bois i’m off for a dommy wank!

by sissokothag17 April 25, 2020

Wanks of Penkridge

Wanks of Penkridge

When something is so rubbish and underwhelming that you instantly presume it came from Penkridge

That tofu wanks of Penkridge

These pills wank of Penkridge

I better get some sleep before my date. I don't want to wank of Penkridge

by OoohLookAtMeGrowler February 19, 2019

Wank Rash

Red patches that appear on ones chest after a vigorous wank. Occurs to excessive wankers.

Jack: “Lads, I was beating my meat last night, looked down, should’ve seen THE STATE of my wank rash!”
Ben: “I get that all the time, I love tugging myself!”

by skinnotheskank May 20, 2022

Bridge Wank

The act of holding yourself up by one hand (e.g. On your bed) and holding your other side up with your feet (e.g. On a table or windowsill) and wanking. The increased blood flowing to the penis makes you more erect.

"Dude I just caught my son bridge wanking in his room."

by Harambeisinourhearts August 24, 2017

Allegorical Wank

Cracking one out over an image which serves as a proxy for an intended (but unattainable) object of desire.

See also 'substitute shuftie' and 'simulacral shuffle'.

Baron Von Trapp couldn't make use of the new governess upon her arrival and so popped to the local church confessional booth with an image of the Virgin Mary for an allegorical wank.

by Theilliterate June 28, 2023

Throwback wank

A masturbation session done when thinking about or looking at pictures of someone from your past. Could be an ex-girlfriend from a few years back, your high school geography teacher, or anyone you no longer interact with.

With no clubs open and no chances to meet new people, all James could do was knock out a few throwback wanks every night.

by J. Domain February 26, 2021