The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem

The theory that all male-identifying individuals can be categorized as either a pirate, a cowboy, or an astronaut. Some combination thereof is a possibility, but one classification is always dominant. The categories need no defined criteria because the correct placement is almost always surprisingly obvious.

"I really like him, which is surprising because based on The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem he's more of an astronaut, and I'm usually more attracted to pirate men."
"I get that. I'm mostly into cowboys at the moment, but I could definitely see myself settling down with an astronaut one day."

by hannahmadison69 January 19, 2024

Flag

Get the The Pirate Cowboy Astronaut Theorem mug.

Coca-Cola Cowboy

A cuck or incel that projects a 'better than you' aspect into any arguement, when regarding a specific niche, hobby, job, etc. This person often time has surface level experience or years of surface level experience to feed the narcissism.

You aint as bright as you think...you're just a Coca-Cola Cowboy that thinks he know it all!

by anonymous June 26, 2024

Flag

Get the Coca-Cola Cowboy mug.

7:30 Cowboy

A rancher or person from Texas who watches NTR having there cows jack them off at 7:30PM every day.

Did you hear George is a 7:30 Cowboy?

by lord of biffs August 1, 2024

Flag

Get the 7:30 Cowboy mug.

dirty porcelain cowboy

Similar to the standard Porcelain Cowboy only you are slamming the drunk/puking chick in the ass while her head is hovering above the toilet.

Kari was hammered and had to puke. I helped her to the washroom like a gentleman but couldn't resist sliding in that ass that was just staring at me while she was bent over hurling. She seemed to be really digging it until the dry heaves started. I almost popped out a couple times during that but stayed on for the 8 count . It was the 1st time either of us had pulled off the Dirty Porcelain Cowboy

by Art Izenkowskis March 23, 2024

Flag