futon john

A douche that likes to remind every person he meets that he was conceived on a futon.

Kid 1: "Have you met Futon John?"

Kid 2: "No, but I heard he was a douche."

Kid 3: "I heard he was conceived on a futon."

Kid 1: "I wish I was conceived on a futon."

by Dubya14 November 25, 2013

John Aron

John Aron is the best kind of person which is consisting of John and Aron

Fuck John Aron is so hot

by jabuvarp July 21, 2019

mary john

the oral act of eating a pot brownie out of ones anus.

“wait robert you guys have been dating for 4 months and you haven’t mary johned yet?”

by wobert r January 6, 2018

dingle-john

When your cell phone rings in your back pocket and because of the precise positioning of the phone in your pocket and the correct ring mode of vibrate and the exact genre of underwear, a pleasing vibration of the scrotum occurs.

Dude, did you just call me?

Yeah.

It produced a wonderful dingle-john.

Oh Yeah?

Thank You.

by Dinglebob Dentist March 25, 2008

John (Splatoon)

We don’t know who he is or what he wants, all we know is that he wears:

Pilot Goggles
Zink Layered LS
Purple High-Horses

Guy 1: Who the FUCK is John (Splatoon) ?
Guy 2: I don’t know

by anonymous September 24, 2023

John Ace

He's the most caring person I've ever known. He will always make you happy. You can always lean on him and always there for you. Best son and eldest of his siblings. He's a honest and genuine person, I can't afford to lose him. Sweet, soft and handsome that's making me crazy. He's my favorite person. And don't be deceive by his look-so-mad voice, he's always like that but he's really kind with a little "kagaspangan".

I love you so much, John Ace.

by Baby Eal June 8, 2021

John Barber

The physical embodiment of dirt, not only does this vile creature lie 24/7 but also goes out of his way to stay well away from anything remotely hygienic. In addition to the blocks of bellchesse that engulf his chode and constantly put him off, he also is sexually attracted to dogs and has various different branded ice lollies stuck between the many many chins and rolls of fat he has.

Friend 1 - “mate did u see how John Barber that toilet was”
Friend 2 - “dude I’ve seen dogs shit out cleaner things”

by urnanscrustyvagina November 4, 2018