Strong hand

To use the malformed or otherwise mis-shappen hand of a normally creepy man, to pleasure an unsuspecting female.

"zomg what are you doing Bob?!"
"I'm showin' you how a man uses his strong hand!"
"Weeth, this feels so good!"

by Mr. Weeth July 20, 2009

invisible hand

The 18th century version of the Little Jon "stranger", in which one sits on his hand until it falls asleep, and then beats off.

The invisible hand is the 18th century version of the Little Jon "stranger".

by mr. ronnie d March 25, 2007

Hand Crank

A reference to pleasurable male masturbation. Jacking off. Wanking one out. Fapping.

Where's Brian? Still in the bathroom? Yea I'm sure he's doing a hand crank.

by Eaton Holgoode April 7, 2017

Grandma Hands

The hands of a grandma, or one who schmooks.

Press harder! Use your grandma hands! Schmook it down!

————— Miss Kristine Iturrino

by Apple Peels June 28, 2018

Hand Delivered

Ejaculation caused by stimulating the penis with ones own hand.

The lady wasn’t putting out last night so I hand delivered one myself.

by uniberg March 10, 2011

Hand sanitizer

The ultimate luxury skin treatment that adds years to your existence.

I'd kill for hand sanitizer, and be killed without it.

by CaptCook March 22, 2020

Hands on the bat

The opposite of Ski poles (one girl, two men- one on either side). Derived from playground baseball games when the captains put their hands on the bat to decide which team goes first. Many hands on one penis.

"I met these two tricks last night...took them back to my place and they put their hands on the bat"

by Señor_Cardgage October 24, 2011