Canada's History is one of the world's most extraordinarily controversial sex acts, and is infamous for being notoriously difficult to perform. It gained popularity in 1987 when PETA launched a campaign against the act because of its mercilessly cruel treatment of animals (the iconic "Ban Canada's History" campaign).
Only two men and one woman can perform Canada's History, and both men must be physically flexible to complete the final stage. To perform a Canada's History, one must obtain authentic moose antlers, a replica of the Stanley Cup, maple syrup, a beavertail, a live Canadian loon, kerosene, a lighter, a length of rope and a Nickelback album. If you use a Celine Dion album from the mid-nineties the act is referred to as a Canada's Antiquity. If you use a Strapping Young Lad album, Canada's Histrionics.
Only two men and one woman can perform Canada's History, and both men must be physically flexible to complete the final stage. To perform a Canada's History, one must obtain authentic moose antlers, a replica of the Stanley Cup, maple syrup, a beavertail, a live Canadian loon, kerosene, a lighter, a length of rope and a Nickelback album. If you use a Celine Dion album from the mid-nineties the act is referred to as a Canada's Antiquity. If you use a Strapping Young Lad album, Canada's Histrionics.
He's crazy you know -- I heard he once did a Canada's History with that chick who works at the 7-11.
by Capillarian February 5, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.the sexual act of having a group of men with explosive diarrhea defecate into an unconscious woman's vagina. After all the men present have made bowel movements, the woman is hung upside down by her feet. The men then take turns guzzling maple syrup and then inducing vomit onto the woman's vagina. The woman, still hung by her feet, is spun around in circles so the rope, cable or chain used to bind her, when let go, causes her to spin wildly out of control. As this happens, the men masturbate. The last man to ejaculate is punched in the face until the suspended woman stops spinning and comes to a complete and total rest. That man is then adorned with moose antlers and must sit on a replica of the stanley cup whittled from the largest log of a beaver dam. The replica also must be filled with poutine (a canadian cuisine consisting of french fries, cottage cheese and gravy). He must remain on this replica until the suspended woman has awakened and consumed all of the aforementioned contents of her vagina with a red and white candy-striped crazy straw.
Stephen Colbert had to suspend his show for a week because he stayed home sick from participating in Canada's History.
by bar britters February 5, 2010
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it means to take a Stanley cup filled with the shit of Ryan Reynolds and Avril Lavigne lubricated with Maple Syrup inside the vaginal area of a transgender, while inserting the ends of a moose's antlers into the rectum's of both the transgender and the other person.
Ironically the first known usage of this sexual act occurred as soon as The Beaver changed its name to Canada's History by Stephen Colbert and 72 transgender virgins of unknown origin.
The addition of canadian animals into the sexual act itself is optional.
Ironically the first known usage of this sexual act occurred as soon as The Beaver changed its name to Canada's History by Stephen Colbert and 72 transgender virgins of unknown origin.
The addition of canadian animals into the sexual act itself is optional.
Damn, did you see what Toby did to that transgender? He totally Canada's Historyed the shit out of it!
by VivaLaColdplaya May 16, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.Canada's history is terriable, and filled with many unspeakable events. It was first brought around by French fur traders, and has been going in for a few hundred years. Many times the Stanley Cup has been in this horriable move.
It is where one takes a jar of maple syrup (has kept Canada's History stable in export for others to use) and lather it on the male penis. Use the stickiness to slide it through a hole in the Stanley cup that runs all the way through, and let the semen enter a hollowed out moose antler a female has up her utereus.
Many have seen Canada's History as evidence that these seemingly polite people are truly evil and ice-holes.
It is where one takes a jar of maple syrup (has kept Canada's History stable in export for others to use) and lather it on the male penis. Use the stickiness to slide it through a hole in the Stanley cup that runs all the way through, and let the semen enter a hollowed out moose antler a female has up her utereus.
Many have seen Canada's History as evidence that these seemingly polite people are truly evil and ice-holes.
"Did you hear Kevin and Miranda were so upset at the so few golds Canada has earned, -eh?"
"Yeah, -eh. They preformed Canada's History to relieve the despair."
"No! I thought they were respectable people."
"Yeah, -eh. They preformed Canada's History to relieve the despair."
"No! I thought they were respectable people."
by Sonic Screwdriver February 19, 2010
Get the Canada's History mug.by Jim Diggins March 28, 2004
Get the Little Canada mug.1. (n.) Also known to most of the world as Canadia, Canada is "America's hat." Canada is known for its immense maple tree supply, saying "aboot" and "eh?", and lots and lots of mooses.
2. (adj.) Super cool; most excellent; awesome
3. (n.) A hat (specifically a hat belonging to the U.S.A.)
4. (n.) One who has the quality and/or ability to talk in a Canadian fashion; One who uses "eh?" and "aboot" and mostly replaces "ou" with "oo".
2. (adj.) Super cool; most excellent; awesome
3. (n.) A hat (specifically a hat belonging to the U.S.A.)
4. (n.) One who has the quality and/or ability to talk in a Canadian fashion; One who uses "eh?" and "aboot" and mostly replaces "ou" with "oo".
1. "Hey, Jim, have you heard about that new Canadia -I mean Canada- place? I went there, like, last week, man!"
2. "Wow, check out that dude over there. He's so Canada!"
3. "Yo, dude! Check out that weird Canada-thing above us on this map!"
4. "Hello, guys. What was all that ruckus aboot at your hoose last night, eh?"
"Wow, he's such a Canada."
2. "Wow, check out that dude over there. He's so Canada!"
3. "Yo, dude! Check out that weird Canada-thing above us on this map!"
4. "Hello, guys. What was all that ruckus aboot at your hoose last night, eh?"
"Wow, he's such a Canada."
by Canadia Fan April 4, 2008
Get the Canada mug.1) A magazine formerly called "The Beaver" till the name was constantly blocked by porn filters (lol).
2) Canadas history is trapping beaver.....its future is being America's parking lot/self-storage spot.
2) Canadas history is trapping beaver.....its future is being America's parking lot/self-storage spot.
by Reinhardtz February 4, 2010
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