swally merchant

noun, Scottish (see swally)
A gentleman who is overly fond of a tipple.

'Shuggy boaked oan a polis efter 3 boatils o Buckie.'
'Daft swally merchant.'

by Al Bum October 22, 2008

patter merchant

Someone who has terrific banter, jokes and charisma. Patter merchant is a compliment, not an insult.

"Have you met JP?"
"Aye, mate, proper patter merchant!"

by JamaoDosSantos November 16, 2020

Dream Merchant

A person or corporate entity that specializes in, or claims to be capable of, helping people fulfill their dreams, fantasies, or deepest aspirations. They are most often empty promises, and the recipients of such services are usually expected to pay a fee in return.

BEWARE of the words: "Come with me and I'll make you famous!" For they are usually uttered from the lips of Dream Merchants.

by Execaters May 29, 2018

Felch Merchant

Someone who offers felching as a service for a price.

Wayne come into my office u felch merchant and felch me. You will get a nice little pay rise.

by Cristiano April 27, 2006

Dole Merchant

Usually people living in city's and towns who do p nothing only cause trouble. Are on "benefits", unemployed and are not seeking work.

The town is covered in dole merchants.

You're man's only a dole merchant, does nothing while i break my back working hard on the farm.

by Agrilawd May 16, 2021

scar merchant

An amateur tattooist or "professional" of bad reputation and low-quality (and low priced) work. Usually an amateur or "a friend who works out of their house", scar merchants, or scratchers are unschooled, unsanitary and generally a big mistake. Going to one is literally buying a scar.

Dude, fuck that guy! Billy Bob is a scar merchant. Go to Tattoo City on Lombard for good work.

by Dr. Badwrench November 8, 2007

Pie merchant

A fat person; someone who delights in he scranning of pies.

See also Boffer, Pie master Fat Pastie

Look at that fat pie merchant!

Shut your face pie merchant!

by MaddogMotherFucker June 24, 2005