Turd Tour

Pooping on a different floor or building so your coworkers won’t know the demonic things you’re capable of.

“Man, I just saw Shawn enter the third floor men’s washroom. Definitely took a turd tour, trying to make it look like someone on the third floor look like a serial office poo’er”

“One of the third floor guys came to the fourth floor then saw it was occupied and got turd tour road blocked.”

by officeworklife July 1, 2015

Cause you touch yourself at night...

Phrase used to answer a question involving 'why' or 'how'. Usually sounds perverted, such as the phrase 'Thats what she said'

"Daddy. Why are there no dinosaurs?"
"Cause you touch yourself at night..."

"How is this possible?!"
"Cause you touch yourself at night..."

by Mr. Frank the Urbanite February 21, 2009

tour de stade

Literally: "tour of stadium"
This is when you, in the words of Jack from Lost, "run all the steps in every section of a stadium up and down."

Jack: It was a Tour de Stade.
Sarah: What?
Jack: When you run all the steps in every section of a stadium up and down.
Sarah: Why would you do that?
Jack: I'm intense.
Sarah: Did you finish?
Jack: No, I hurt my ankle.
Sarah: That sucks for you.
-from Lost season 2 episode 1

by Bob Gunderson April 25, 2006

Tourettes Guy

A drunk, overweight man who happens to have Tourettes Syndrome. Tourettes Guy enjoys yelling, swearing and destroying. He is often filmed philosophizes on topics such as the difference between pissing and shitting out the window, the evil of head and shoulders, problems with Colgate Toothpaste (ONLY the one with Tarter Control) and how banana's deficate. Possibly the funniest man alive to date. Made famous by www.tourettesguy.com and it's creators.

PISSING OUT THE WINDOW AND SHITTING OUT THE WINDOW ARE TWO DIFFERENT THINGS!


Jon: You seen Tourettes Guy yet?
Scott: Hell yeah. I want Tourettes now!

by Printnamehere December 11, 2004

can't touch this

MC Hammer had a hit with the name "U Can't Touch This." Generally means "I'm too good for you." or "You'll never be as good as I am."

Two people are dancing:
Person 1: Can't touch this!
Person 2: Darn. (walks off the dance floor)

by ilovealtoids November 7, 2004

tough luck

another way of saying "that's too bad" or "you'll have to deal with it"

You need to go to your locker? Tough luck; I don't give hall passes!

by kasey White December 10, 2003

Brew Tout

This term is found mostly in Northern Ireland.
In Northern Ireland, if you are claiming benefits (welfare) you are 'On the brew".
Some people claim benefits despite being completely able bodied and 'fit for work', but rely on 'sick lines' from their GP so they don't have to work.

A tout comes under various synonyms such as snitch, rat, nark, informant, grass, whistle-blower.

If you know of someone that does this, you can call up your local job centre and tell them who it is and what they're doing. This will put that person under investigation. Doing this makes you a brew tout. If people find out that you are a brew tout you will be targeted by paramilitaries or anyone associated with the person you touted on and beaten severely including a possible kneecapping.

Billy : Here mate, how do you afford all this gear if you ain't working?
James : On the brew mate, don't have to work and the money still rolls in, mint mate.
Billy : So what's wrong with ye? You disabled or sick or something?
James : Na bud just can't be bothered like, can't prove it so what's the problem?
Billy : Ahh shit well fair play to ye lad, here I gotta jump, see ye around mate.
*Billy reports James to Benefits agency or Job Centre*
*James goes under investigation and loses his benefits*

All fingers point to Billy as the suspect, people start calling him a Brew Tout.

Billy's house is visited by the 'boys', his windows are smashed along with his knees.

All Touts Are Targets (ATAT) is sprayed across his garden fence.

by SkinnedHamster March 8, 2019