Porch Monkey

1. This refers to a person who dabbles in the Greco-Roman philosophy of stoicism but seems to, choose to lack the maturity or discipline to truly practice it in any serious sense.

Stoicism's origin stepms from the Greek phrase "Stoa Poikile" which translates to "painted porch." "Stoa" meaning porch. Thus they inhabit the porch but have all the seriousness and dedication a monkey would have toward serious philosophy.
2. Porch monkey is also a derogatory term to someone who practices stoic philosophy.
3. Porch monkey is also a highly derogatory term for black person and typically has no bearing on his philisophical outlooks.

Usage note: To avoid being seen as a racist, only use this term to refer to stoics who cannot be mistaken for people of color.

1. "Alexander says he is a stoic, but after seeing his temper tantrum the other day, I'm starting to think he's just a porch monkey."
2. "Lucius is lecturing us all again about how we shouldn't let our emotions control our character. He's such a porch monkey."
3. "Kwame thought Bob was lashing out at him for being a stoic when Bob called him a "porch monkey," but Bob was simply an obnoxious racist. Kwame practiced stoicism however and laughed it off, just making non-stoic Bob angrier.

by revoLucian1776 February 14, 2023

Back Porch Weed

The type of bud cops can't smell from the street, but still gives an adequete high.

Guy 1: "Hold on, man. There's a cop patrolling the street." Guy 2: "Ha, not a problem. This is 100% pure back porch weed. Only thing he'll be smelling is the wrap." Guy 1: "Ahhh, you got that back porch bud, I got you"

by Coughdropper November 11, 2015

porchin' it

When you and your friends go to a friends house and sit on their front porch and smoke endless amounts of marijuana
:)

Steven:Hey dude what are you doin?
Ryan: Not much man just porchin' it.
Steven:Ah hell yeah? ill be there in a minute
Michael:im comin to nigga!

by Steven O... September 12, 2006

porch dick

Anyone who sits on their porch and shouts rude and obnoxious comments to people walking by. first heard on talking dead.

I can't believe he said that to us while we were walking by, he is such a porch dick.

by Heydude2015 March 8, 2015

SUNY Purchase

A college set in a small town. Close to white plains, right by Manhattanville. Student body consists of musician, dancers, actors, cokeheads, pot heads, alcoholics, film makers and other random majors. Filled with inner city kids. Most of the students are "artists" and try to dress as oddly as possible to express their inner creativity. 50% gay and about 80% bisexual. This college has state troopers whose job it is to ruin as many lives as possible.

"What are you wearing tomorrow?"
"Well I was thinking about leggings, a patchwork skirt, my chuck taylors, and that shirt I got from goodwill...Wanna help me dye my hair tommorow? I was thinking Orange"
"Sure, wanna smoke in W2?"
"OK, because I go to SUNY Purchase"

by Jillian and Olivia October 28, 2006

ALABAMA PORCH MONKEY

a derogatory word for a person of African descent; a negro

1. The Alabama porch monkey tends to be lazy and would rather draw welfare than work.
2.The Alabama porch monkey likes to wear gold chains and drink malt liquor.

by Pittovsky July 21, 2008

porch monkey

A derogatory for a person of african or african american decent. BUT it could also mean a generally lazy person. This term came to be when you think of african americans sitting on there porch chatting it up. Also in the movie Clerks II, the sequal to Clerks, Randal tries to reclaim it as a new term for lazy people. And thus offends several customers and his boss.

*Police Officer sees Porch Monkey 4 Life written on the back of Randal's Mooby Uniform and looks flabbergasted*

Randal: Im taking it back!

EX2

Racist: You filthy crack smoking porch monkey!

by Dodectabone July 21, 2006