What to do whenever you aren't in school or at work. Actually, you can do it there too, but be subtle.
by IM JERKING OFF RITE NOW April 04, 2009
Masturbation is perfectly natural. almost all guys do this:
Wait until your home alone or at night,
then go to your room and close the door.
take off all your clothes and grasp your penis in any or both hands. (make sure yiu have a box off kleenex near by)
then slowly begin to rub your penis until you get to a pace you like,
then rub faster at your choice of pace,
then rub really fast until you ejaculate which feels really awsome,
then wipe up the sperm (or in some cases, lick it up) this is best done while sitting in a chair or lying down, looking at porn or other sources of hornyness
Wait until your home alone or at night,
then go to your room and close the door.
take off all your clothes and grasp your penis in any or both hands. (make sure yiu have a box off kleenex near by)
then slowly begin to rub your penis until you get to a pace you like,
then rub faster at your choice of pace,
then rub really fast until you ejaculate which feels really awsome,
then wipe up the sperm (or in some cases, lick it up) this is best done while sitting in a chair or lying down, looking at porn or other sources of hornyness
well, im off do some masturbation, bye (dont listen to anyone who says its bad for you, its completely healthy.... just dont do it before you fuck a hoe or she'll be dissapointed
by some guy 500 March 21, 2009
'but sarge, that dirty old woman shouldn'y have been looking in the first place, besides, im sure its not her first experience of masturbation''
by tommy060289 July 14, 2006
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A way for men or women to deal with problems without getting up. terms for men include: jerk off, rub one out, beat off, wack ones turkey, and shoot clue goo. In a womens case it could be Fingering and flicking the bean around or use a dildo.
How to use masturbation in a conversation.
For a man, "hey steve, wanna play some B-Ball?"
"Nah im kinda tired, im gonna go home, put on the Tv, rub one out and take a nap.
women do not usually discuss this subject but if they did it would go a little something like this.
"hey jacky, want to go to the mall?"
"I think im going to go back to the car and flick my bean around."
Or
"Im going to go home and check my myspace and punch my cat"
For a man, "hey steve, wanna play some B-Ball?"
"Nah im kinda tired, im gonna go home, put on the Tv, rub one out and take a nap.
women do not usually discuss this subject but if they did it would go a little something like this.
"hey jacky, want to go to the mall?"
"I think im going to go back to the car and flick my bean around."
Or
"Im going to go home and check my myspace and punch my cat"
by Bobsaget,dannytanner January 07, 2008
When your 5 finger fiance gives you a bit of a knob-job. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE does it does it but still people are embarrassed by it. It SHOULD be that if you didn't masturbate it was sick or weird, not the other way around! I do it, I know another guy that does it, and I am very sure that everyone else in my school does it. Note: Do it, it feels soooooo great. P.s. for extra pleasure use lubricant and watch hardcore porn while you do it this way you get great pleasure and an AMAZING orgasm!
Me and ***** were in my house by ourselves so we went on the net and watched some porn...then we masturbated and neither of us felt embarrassed.
by fapperface June 21, 2005