z-scaled

(noun)

a. the act of taking something that is working perfectly well and completely AND UTTERLY fucking it to the point where it becomes a brick

b. the process in which a network admin takes a perfectly good internet connection and throttles, blocks, and filters the living fuck out of it until it can’t even load a fucking webpage

c. security-theater fuckery that turns working shit into expensive garbage

"The IT department just Z-scaled the fucking Wi-Fi again"

"The network admin walked in, saw everything running smoothly, and immediately Z-scaled the shit out of it."

“I would love to review your document, but I got z-scaled bro”

by c0zyBear March 24, 2026

Lahey Scale

The level of drunk you are on a 1 to ten scale. Named for the Late Great Jim Lahey of Sunnyvale Trailer Park.

“Last night I was 8 out of ten drunk on the Lahey Scale!”

by TimeFoolery42 October 16, 2025

Smartwater-Scale

A discreet scale used to measure sizes of meat, typically ones used by males.
Meat is measured from the bottom of a Smartwater bottle to the top.

John: Hey, my meat goes to the 'T' on the Smartwater-Scale!
Bob: Which one?
John: The first one..

by DancingShoe1048 December 23, 2025

The Murph Scale

a scale for telling just how 'blank' something is. the scale CAN NOT be exceeded

On the Murph scale of 1 to awesome, that was awesome

On the Murph scale of 1 to bad, that was a 1

by The Brickmeister December 17, 2009

The 2-Scale

The 2-Scale is a very simple way to rate a woman when you first encounter them.

0: Would not put dick in
1: Would put dick in
2: Would eat cream out of her asshole

Todd: "Do you see Sara over there? What would you rate her on The 2-Scale?"
Dave: "Yeah, I'd say she's a 1"
Todd: "Really? She is totally a 2!"

by SallyMcSaggyTits May 9, 2015

Rekt'd-tor Scale

Level of how badly someone gets "Rekt" in a game on a scale of 1-10

Their team is a loosing by five points and its the last quarter of the match! Thats a nine on the "Rekt'd-tor scale".

by DrStrangewolf October 8, 2015

mully girl scale

The retro version of the female rating scale where an actual 2 is a 10

Bill "Man she's a 10"

Henry *looks at girl with a butterface who would have an average rating or a 2 or less* "yea a 10 on the Mully girl scale"

by Mully girl scale July 13, 2016