child

a derogatory term for someone under the age of 13 or something, though most assholes call people under 18 children. contrary to popular belief, children are the best form of human that has ever existed, due to their innocence, uninhibited creativity, friendliness, and irresistible humor. all children are born with large amounts of creativity and imagination, though society quickly hushes that away so they can become an ass-faced drone to keep the modern society alive. children are a blessing, as they have yet to be turned into temper-mental assholes because life keeps pissing on their faces. however, some children can keep their souls, seeing that society is only tearing them down, so they lift themselves up and realize that life is testing you, and if you know that EVERYTHING IS AWESOME, you will pass, and be happy until you die and transcend into glob-world.

Adult 1: ha! look at that child!
Adult 2: yeah, he can't do anything.
Child: *builds completely original and awesome thing out of LEGOs, completely showing up anything the adults had ever done in their lives*
Adult 1:... holy crap
Adult 2:... he's an adult in disguise!

Child: naw, I'm just better than you in every way. just like all the other children on the earth.

by A-person_yay February 22, 2014

Child predator

Normally a catholic priest or middle aged man with a ford transit who like to capture and have intercourses with young children

See that priest over there
yeah
he is a child predator

by Clarkson.com October 21, 2020

crazy white children

Almost all of the posters on urban dictionary. Most are suburbanites that think they are African-American. See wigger.

You all are a bunch of crazy white children.

by Tankers April 30, 2006

National Beat Children Day

The definition of "National Beat Children Day" is, where you can get people like Freya's loud and annoying sister, and beat them to smithereens.

ect. "Hey! Its National Beat Children Day!"

"What?"

KILL THE CHILDREN

by ManWhoHatesChildren October 12, 2020

Lap Children

Term used to describe mildly unrully children held by adults while traveling (usually, but not always, used in reference to air travel).

That flight was terrible, the lap children were obnoxious.

by Zekezula February 26, 2009

Butt child

A butt child is a a weak minded follower of another individual normally a partner/boss at work. He/she has no free will or independent thought but is completely infatuated with their icon and follows them around unthinkingly. They agree with everything their idol says without hesitation like a child.

Often a weaker member of a particular nauseating couple who dotes upon their partner unaware of what this looks like to others.

Annoying acolyte who imitates their masters actions.

Did you see the way that douche followed her round all night, jeez what a Butt child.

At work Mike agrees with everything Rob says. Mike is Rob's Butt child.

I saw Hannah and her butt child at the bar.

by berto744 June 21, 2010

anal child

a man having the baby of another man via his anus.

john had bobby's anal child after a night of wild homo sex

by bob smith May 13, 2005