who would have thought

an expression used when one is surprised by something that has happened and/or something that they unexpectedly learned.

Joe after being married for 25 years and fathering four children, left his wife for women 20 years older than him. Who would have thought.

by GalacticSoulBrother May 19, 2016

should have been a wank

used to describe a person that would have made a better cleanex stain than they do a human

Dave Roberts is so completly useless he realy should have been a wank

by grandmasterbob September 22, 2009

we'll always have paris

either the most romantic way to part, as seen in Casa Blanca, or the actual worst way to say goodbye to the chick who you locked in your basement, impregnated, and tried to murder....

Oliver Thredson: There are pieces of her scattered from Plymouth to Springfield...But you know what, Lana? We'll always have Paris.

by erinreesealex June 25, 2017

Having Your Cake

Eating and then throwing up soap, mostly from urinals.

Mike got dared to have his cake at a Bacholer's Party. He was sick for weeks afterwards.

Having Your Cake is a stupid dare most of the time.

by GabbehGurl July 11, 2010

Have you got land?

A come on or chat up line, usually found in use in the west of Ireland, especially in Limerick by students who come from a farming background. At the present moment not one person has scored using this chat up line.

Farmer walks into a bar sees a beautiful woman:

Man: "Have you got land?"

Woman: "..." (stares at him and walks away)

by beriberry November 22, 2011

I have fat nuts

When you have 2 large testicular objects under your small peepee.

Bobby; I have FAT nuts
Timmy; Lol me to.

by anonymous November 20, 2021

you can have a coke

"You can have a coke" is a more socially and publicly acceptable way of saying "you can s my d".

Can also be combined with lol-cat-speak for "You can haz a coke" or "A coke -- you can haz it".

Bon Qui Qui at King Burger:

Customer: Can I get a #6 with a cookies & cream milkshake?

Bon Qui Qui: You sure you don't just want a coke?

Customer: Pardon?

Bon Qui Qui: Then I gotta get the ice cream out, put some cookies all up in it. I don't even know how to use that blender, they got me pressin' all these crazy buttons. No, you can have a coke.

by BabyGing July 9, 2011