Close Encounter Of The Sperm Kind

When you almost get caught jacking off.

Billy: My sister almost walked in on me masturbating.
Fred: Guess you could call that "A Close Encounter Of The Sperm Kind".
Billy: Damn it Fred, you're not funny.

by AcneAndAnthrax May 4, 2015

close business

To have sex with a female

"Yo Nick did you close business with that chick last week?"
"Na bro, she was on the rag"

by Cletus93 April 21, 2017

Closet Faggot

Anyone that belongs to a group that can't be spoken of in a public setting, these groups usually only fuck people over.

YES I AM TALKING TO YOUS GUYS!!!

They would have promoted me but I told them I am not and will not be a closet faggot.

by Ragnar Funnies September 5, 2018

closeted marxist

When a person, who affiliates him/herself with stark conservatives, but at the same time displays deep affection towards socialist welfare states, then that person is a closeted marxist.

- Isn't it weird that Jack Posobiec is so busy talking 24/7 about how good it is to live in Poland?
- Yeah, since Poland is a socialist welfare state, with many Venezuela-like programs implemented using taxpayers money by the Kaczyński's PiS party government.
- Right! I guess he's just another closeted marxist.

by WhiteDudeFromPoland November 19, 2018

Closet mom

A woman who is not upfront about being a mother.

“I went in two dates with this hottie before she dropped the bomb that she has kids.What a closet mom

by Ubbhed September 7, 2019

Close

A word made up by someone who’s afraid to get to close, near someone or an object.

Yo, bro, I thing he is afraid to get close to her.

by Nick is the best Jonas Brother October 15, 2019

Closeted pedophile

Guys stuck in their 13 years old fantasies who are attracted to school girls and girls who dress very young with pink hair and anime/cartoonish vibes.

A- Dude check out this girl
B-WTF you’re a sick Closeted pedophile and you need help!

by Nihilistic Virgin May 31, 2021