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Douche Turtle

We need to get that Douche Turtle out of office.
by Flying Thesaurus August 5, 2019
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Turtle of Life

The Story of The Turtle of Life:
The Turtle of Life has never been born unto a family of glory and righteousness.

Thus he gave unto himself a gift. This gift was the Pride of the Lions, and what caused the Sadness of the Ravens and the Murder of the Crows. The Murder brought about a new era and the skies were clear for all other birds feared this new gift, especially the seagulls. When the seagulls, learned of their fate and that they had been exiled from the skies they decided to become creatures of earth and thus, transformed into moles. The moles were not pleased by the overcrowding of the earth and thus wished to be Crows. Now moles, living under a rock, didn’t know about the Murder of the Crows, and so they were killed, swiftly and brutally. The Seagulls then realized that turtles’ bellies were weak and they held their bellies up to the warm earth. So the Moles attempted siege of the shelled creatures. The Turtles then pinned the blame on the Turtle of Life who was never there, and they were killed. The Turtle of Life did not come back to save them for he was never there… or was he.
by FSMFan June 12, 2009
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Turtle press

A turtle press is when you grab a turd out of the toilet. It can be yours or a strangers, and shove it back into your anus in case you missed any nutrients such as protein or vitamins. Thus your anus being the turtle shell and the poop being the turtle
Dude did you hear Frank doing a turtle press last night?
by Pizzafart33 May 12, 2023
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Swaggy Turtle

A swaggy turtle has a lot of swag and style but is shy😏🤏🏼 yet steaming hot and scrumptious
by Carole J November 3, 2020
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elderly turtle

One of Gerard Way 's most popular nicknames.
Example1
PersonA: Can you believe Mikey Way is getting hotter and hotter while his brother is slightly turning into an elderly gay turtle?

Example2
Frank Iero : "I bought a new pillow for my bunk today. Just got into bed and found out it smells like it was previously used owned by an elderly turtle. Uncool" (source Twitter)
Everyone: "Same Frank we miss him too"
by ThatKilljoy February 14, 2017
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Turtle Pope

Best character in elden ring. He is the embodiment of all that is holy and right in the world and if attacked you will have a 100,000,000 bounty put on your head and will be hunted down by john wick. You can't kill the john wick.
I accidently killed the turtle pope and John Wick invaded my world and when he killed me he corrupted my save file.
by TurtlePopeFollower March 25, 2022
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turtle glove

when you do your DT homework but youre too slow to do it
I almost finished my DT homework, but I turtle gloved it
by wobblebeard November 21, 2019
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