Cellar Boxing

When you open a short position on a company and make the company hemorrhage from within with a consulting group and short the stock to oblivion plus set the value of the asset down with high frequency trading and dark pool abuse.

You never close the position to save money on taxes and label it Securties not yet purchased and hope nobody catches on.

If a hedgefund or say, market maker, is looking to make serious returns. They would resort to creating a narrative to not be UNCERTAIN in their position.

The grift.
1. Open a short position on a publicly traded company.
2. Insert your parasites from say a sort of Consulting Group, Boston is a good place to look.
3. Have your parasites harvest the host company and make it hemorrhage from within.
4. Watch as the financials turn to ruin quarter over quarter and your short position grow larger and larger over time.
5. Never close out your short in say, Sears or Blockbuster, after using this very strategy to save money in taxes as you Cellar boxing the company with high frequency trading algorithms and dark pool order routing.
6. Use your short position that you never closed as collateral to continue the scheme rolling onto other companies. (SECURITIES NOT YET PURCHASED) lol
7. Hope to high heaven no activists investors get pissed off with the obvious grift and lack of enforcement since you buy off regulating bodies, or overshadow them.
8. Pay media and talking heads to push your narrative and grift gaslighting the populous and claiming conspiracy if anyone dares protest your seat at the helm.
9. Age like a gallon of Mayo in the hot sun due to stress and... Buy one more day until eventually...
10. Whoops 🦧

by theblackadder March 2, 2023

hollywood cellar

coolest store ever. has cool phantom of the opera stuff

phantom of the opera stuff gerard buter is sexy

by Sandy March 20, 2005

cellar dweller

someone who thinks themselves better than another person because their houses have added features another persons might not.

"he's such a cellar dweller, so what if my house only has two floors?"

by Thom Gavin December 14, 2008

cellaware

That compulsion one gets to check their cell phone when you see someone else checking theirs.

I became cellaware Dec 18th 2003 at the ring of a cellphone at Wrigley Field.

Her cellawareness haunted her even without her cellphone

by caddydaddy84 January 28, 2009

cellating

the act of asking a dude/chick out over a phone call or text message

person 1:are u cellating her

person 2:maybe

by wolfwind March 9, 2009

Cellaerial Failure

When someone has lost their cell phone signal and attempts to climb to higher and out of reach places to reconnect and fails by not getting the signal or falling on their ass

john: hey what the hell is bob doing way up there

tim: looks as if hes trying to get a signal for is phone

john: oh well thats just gonna end in cellaerial failure

by TheLurkingMoose October 16, 2009

cellvailable

1. Cell phone is on
2. Cell service is perfect.
3. Land line unavailable

1. I will be cellvailable from 8-5 Monday thru Friday
2. You will be cellvailable at our resort
3. This location is cellvailable only

by ngtgrl September 24, 2013