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Platinum monkey

A platinum monkey is referring to the best pussy you'll ever get. Tight, soft, perfection.

"It don't stay platinum by being a hoe!"
Be careful with a platinum monkey...it will make you fall in love!
by Jnwrolin1019 May 4, 2016
mugGet the Platinum monkeymug.

Monkey Rape

When a monkey comes up and rapes any random person
by Anonymous October 31, 2003
mugGet the Monkey Rapemug.

Gooch Monkey

1. (Noun) An individual with a fetish for gooches

2. (Noun) An individual who has had someone's hairy gooch rubbed all over their face, creating a hairy monkey-like appearance
1. "Did you see that guy staring at my Gooch?!?!"
"Yeah! He must have been a Gooch Monkey!!!"

2."That cheap hooker was a Gooch Monkey after I was through with her."
by Gangstablu January 5, 2011
mugGet the Gooch Monkeymug.

monkey hustle

A situation in which the people involved yank your chain to create the illusion that progress is happening even though it isn't. A subtle smoke screen meant to confuse you.

It is a method often used by politicians, customer service reps and anyone else who wants to make you believe something is true.

Imagine a group of monkeys dancing or moving about to give the impression that they are working hard when, in fact, they aren't. Dancing monkeys are meant to distract you so that you take your eye off the ball.
1) Customer service is giving me the monkey hustle. I called for assistance with my bill. I spoke with three representatives, giving the same information, they say hold please then pass me to the next rep.

2) The confusion surrounding the pastor who wants to burn a holy book has officially become a monkey hustle.

3) This website is giving me the monkey hustle. Every time I click on a link it opens a new window directing me away from the information that I'm looking for.
by voodoo chile September 16, 2010
mugGet the monkey hustlemug.

marketing monkey

Someone who feels the need to recite a companies marketing as if it was the truth with out even stopping to think about what it even means.
Douchebag: "Mac OS X is better than windoez because it is POSIX certified because the Apple product page told me so."
Someone in IT: "Do you even know what POSIX stands for?"
Douchebag: "Erm... No... But it means your computer is secure, right?"
Someone in IT: "You do know that Windows has been POSIX certified since 2000, right?"
Douchebag: "Uh..."
Someone in IT: "Dude, you're such a marketing monkey... Spend less time on 'imasturbatetomymac.com' and more time reading about real computers."
by Someone in IT January 6, 2008
mugGet the marketing monkeymug.

guff monkey

You stink, you filthy little guff monkey
by pantsonhead December 23, 2002
mugGet the guff monkeymug.

Monkey Kill

Monkey Kill - verb - To kill a person in the manner that a monkey/chimpanzee would kill a person; i.e. ripping a face off, biting off digits, and removing a person's genitalia forcibly and in a most rude manner, and then throwing feces on the victim.
That guy who found his daughter naked in the pervert's living-room should have monkey killed that son of a bitch on the spot.
by Dougie Dougster August 20, 2011
mugGet the Monkey Killmug.

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