Universal Lag

The little time that seperates what you do online from what others do. This usually split-second time difference can seriously deduct from online gaming skill.

Example 1:
Guy1:*Gets sniped right as he released a shot at the other sniper, universal lag making it so he never really shot due to the fact that he shot at the last second, the server not taking notice of it due to universal lag* DAMN UNIVERSAL LAG!!

Example 2:
Guy1's screen:
Guy1: I love you.
Girl1: You never say you love me, I'm leaving you.

Girl1's screen:
Girl1: You never say you love me, I'm leaving you.
Guy1: I love you.

by ThePerfectionist November 15, 2010

Simpson University

Simpson University is a private Christian University located in Redding. The university is currently under academic probation as its leadership could not get their shit together in enough time before the accreditors came knocking. Simpson would be better defined by precisely what it is not, it is not academically rigorous, it is not welcoming to diversity, it does not respond well to new ideas, and it is abhorrent to to what a university should be.

Andrew: "Where are you going to school?"
Jessica: "Simpson University."
Andrew: "Isn't that the school where a few of the Biology professors teach creationism?"
Jessica: "Yeah I don't believe in science my parents told me its lie invented by the Jews and Homosexuals.

by SUAdmissionsTeam October 20, 2017

Squidward University

An Ivy Leauge school specializing in the study of Pooptolgy

"Wow, I finally got my degree from Squidward University! I can finally study Mao Zedongs poop!" - Zachareigh

by Nardothepig February 24, 2020

Milk the Universe

An existential phrase used to describe the feeling of grabbing the universe by the supple teets and chugging down that cosmic milk.

Similar to "Grabbing the Bull by the Horns"

"Quit your job man, go ahead, Milk the Universe"

"Dude, Jenny's down to tongue wrestle. Go get her dog. Milk the Universe"

by yellowshnow May 16, 2019

eastern university

a small, Christian university on Philadelphia's Main Line. Students that attend Eastern are either hard-core Christians, athletes, alcoholics or are both athletes and alcoholics. You'll meet your best friends here but will also meet psychopaths too. While attending EU you will either develop a fear of geese or will chase them across campus. You also might begin to develop a superiority complex if you start to attend Christian things (aka Wednesday Night Worship). Overall pretty liberal as far as Christian schools go but living in the dorms is a lot like living with your parents. Open door policy & no alcohol. But, given the fact there are 5 liquor stores within 5 miles of EU, a nice backpack will get you past the RAs who could not give less of a fuck and are probably drunk themselves. Since Villanova is 10 minutes away a lot of EU students also self-identify as Nova basketball fans even though they have no fucking clue what the rules are.

"I go to Eastern University." "Where the heck is that?" "Oh, it's on the Main Line. I basically go to Villanova. #GoCats"

by average christian December 16, 2020

Dump University

A more apt way of saying Trump University.

"I'm a Dump University grajuat!" said Mel.

by Ereck Flowers October 23, 2018

university breakfast

A university breakfast is when you wake up and smoke research chemicals off of foil. It is similar to the Kentucky breakfast and the wake and bake but covers any chemicals being used for research, marked not for human consumption.

Chaz blew through that DCK because a true scholar eats a University Breakfast

by BillyP123 March 11, 2017