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Church

1) A franchise, money-making machine based on god's word, the Bible.

Religious cults like Christianity, Catholicism, Buddhism, etc. each claim that god's word, which Bible is, belongs exclusively to them and their what they claim "god", when in reality re-ligious god is not different from an idol, material doll without any spiritual meaning. Word "religion" translated from Latin, literally means re-ligion, "upside down spirituality".

2) An institute of brainwashing and establishing control over the people. It's done by projecting slave-master relationship and strict power hierarchy, like god is ABOVE and people are his _slaves_. When in reality god is unknown. Unfathomable. He is NOT person or human-like. So it's not even "he". Somehow from this idea it's projected that even nominally government _serves_ the people, somehow government is corrupt and above people in reality, and that's totally fine, BECAUSE this is how GOD is.

That's why it's so important to support one-god religions and claim that religions with more than one god are outdated.
1) Example:
- Hey, I want to make some money off people's fear of their inadequacy media instills in them.
- Why don't you invest in a Church, this business is greatly supported by the government in any country as it supplements the propaganda.

2) Example:

- Hey, do you go to Church?
- Of course I do, it makes me feel good feeding my trauma-bond it constantly deepens making me feel guilty and forgiven by the government at the same time.
by Nikita1998 June 18, 2022
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reform The Church

to become a nihilist/anarchist/political shit disturber.
a history professor: students, what's the fastest way to go hell and to be punished by either G-d or the Unforgivables?

student: to become Jesus Christ the historical character and reform The Church?

professor: Correct you are, but this only applies, as you yourself pointed out, to Jesus the historical character, well since the Romans were pantheists
by Sexydimma June 15, 2012
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Church Shooting

Wow, yeah, that holy war isn't going great, is it? Looks like the Christians have lost their edge. What's the score now?
Hym "You hear about the church shooting? I didn't get an official score but I'll google it eventually... Wasn't I just saying it's been a minute? There might have been a superbowl parade one too."
by Hym Iam February 16, 2024
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God Church

Several years ago, an ancient species know as "Viners" ruled the universe. Viners were known for having an excessive amount of comedical qualities, aswell as being extremely white. The almighty Jake Paul, their father, created the so called "white people language" so the Viners could communicate. In this complex language Viners, also known as white people, used expressions like "spicy", "dab" and of course the great "god church". Intellegent scientists are capeable of understanding many of these expressions, but some are still unexplainable.
by Intellegent Professor June 5, 2017
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jack church

A cool guy that lives in the middle of Antarctica, travelling from igloo to igloo every day, travelling with the penguins and polarbears. If you try to look at him while in the snow, it is impossible. He is pale white with light coloured hair, basically an albino black man (Also white).
Hey, jack church.

Hey!

Lets play in the snow!

OK!

Whoa! Where the hell did you go jack church?!?

Im ovvveeeerrrrr hhhheeeeerrrrrreeeeeee!!!
by DatUnSmartKid May 30, 2018
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Church-rat

A person who worships the Christian/Catholic faith to the point of practically living inside the church but at the same time not wanting to become a priest/nun.
Todd is such a Church-rat
by TheNightParade June 17, 2023
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reform The Church

to become a nihilist/anarchist/political shit disturber.
a history professor: students, what's the fastest way to go hell and to be punished by the Unforgivables?

student: to become a sort Jesus Christ the real historical character in the modern world and reform The Church by becoming a Communist?

professor: Correct you are, but this only applies, as you yourself pointed out, to Jesus the historical character, well since the Romans were pantheists and because a lot of people, even historians, would disagree as to who Jesus the religious figure is or should be.
by Sexydimma January 12, 2013
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