I'm your dad

A comeback of the "yo' mama" genre. If you really think about its implications, it's rather insulting.
Steve: "Yo' mama blows so hard she started Hurricane Katrina tryin' to put out the candles on her birthday cake."
Tony: "Awwww sheeit..."
Derek: "All right."
Steve: "Yo' brother so broke and stupid he went to the Nickelback concert to try to get 5 cents."
Tony: "Diggity damn..."
Derek: "Oh yeah?"
Steve: "Yeah. And I heard your sister got a summer job breedin' hound dogs!"
Tony: "Ooh...that hurts."
Derek: "Well I'm your dad."
Steve: "What?"
Derek: "Yeah, just got the paternity test results. I remember that night. I was in line right behind the St. John's basketball team."
Tony: "Ooooooh snap! You just got served, son."
by Nick D September 08, 2005
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I'm a Klingon, BITCH!!

This phrase is pretty much useful in any situation. It shows that you are a higher individuals than others.
In a game of baseball, Johnny has just pitched a no-hitter.
Teammate: How'd you do that?
Johnny: 'Cause I'm a Klingon, BITCH!!

A mom sends a very upset Veroniqua upstairs.
Mom: Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Veroniqua: I'm a FUCKIN Klingon, BITCH!!!!
by Ass Kicka May 11, 2011
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i'm off to bed

It's used when you want to say it's your bedtime, that you are going to sleep now.
WOW! It's half past three! I gotta work tomorrow. I'm off to bed now, you guys!
by We are Speakers July 02, 2017
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I'm proud of you

The one thing everyone wants their dad to tell them
"Jimmy, I'm proud of you"
by imissmydad August 11, 2021
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I'm so screwed

You say this when you're in deep trouble.
Dude, i'm so screwed by the cops for driving too fast.
by aeer May 18, 2011
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I'm going to Joes

A phrase used when your friends bail out , or do not want to associate with you. So instead you find some hell hole to go to and waste your time there instead. Also can be used when something your working on does not work out right. The word Joes comes after a run down shit hole bar in Reading Pa, that contains nothing but trash.
Lindsey: Can you pick me up tonight to go to the bar.
Mike: No!
Lindsey: Fine I'm going to joes.

Alex: I can't get the car started.
Travis: Is it a Dead Battery?
Alex: Yes, I'm going to joes.
by Intergalactic November 26, 2014
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I'm On Yo Neck

Another way of saying you are on someone's ass
"Nigga I'm On Yo Neck for that ugly ass outfit you got on"
by PruittTheKid June 24, 2021
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