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One who sit's inside all day and scopes young children from their window of choice. Usually uses binoculars, at times a telescope if necessary. A total douchebag that usually has an inverted penis. He is also predestined for lifelong virginity. A Fat, Irish Drunk, With hilarious stories about almost dying, getting wasted, and a creepy little girl that haunts his house. YOUNG MARINE!!!! A mysterious creature that can neither shower nor speak proper english. Even though it lacks the male genatailia the Mike is some how able to masturbate during math classes. This creature is often seen wearing a red coat, sadly it is only able to shed this coat every 4-5 years. It is often wondered how the Mike will carry on offspring as no female would ever mate with it. The Mike's obsession with childrens games such as Pokemon suggests it will become a child molester in its adulthood. and acts like a dip shit dinosaur
Mike: Shut up, i'm stalking this hot chick.
Nick: She's 6 years old.

Dirty Mike Wilson 

smearing shit out of your own ass on your face and then going balls deep in the nearest gay man while screaming: i love huge black cock with pearly white cum
Im giving Larry a Dirty Mike Wilson while thinking about Shaquil Oneal
Dirty Mike Wilson by john s November 12, 2004

A balless mike 

A man who is whipped by a fat ass bi-polar bitch and doesn't have the balls to stand up to 'it'. A man who was obviously absent the day they handed out balls. A man who does everything in his power to obey his mammoth of a woman, but will never again be reunited with his balls she keeps in a jar.
Damn, it look like that balless mike can't go to the game again, he has to sand his wife's feet.

Don't be a ballness mike, tell the bitch you can't keep filling the fridge just to have her consume the contents as soon as you leave the room.

He rode his bike to work in the snow again so his fat ass woman could keep the car for her Mcdonalds run what a balless mike he is.
A balless mike by Sass sha J May 25, 2010

Mike Portnoy 

Simply put, GOD. Known worldwide amongst drummers for his amazing double-bass grooves and his dynamic style, Mike Portnoy has played for Dream Theater since its beginning. He has also performed with TransAtlantic, OSI, Liquid Tension Experiment, Hammer of the Gods, and others. He's also a great lyricist, and an amazing person.
Mike Portnoy by Jon De Vogel December 1, 2003

Mike Garth 

The best parody rapper ever. Has hit songs including, "I commute to college"
Mike Garth by Leandro44 April 2, 2009

Frozen Mike 

When a male, named MIKE, eats enough fiber to order to solidfy and pass an excrement larger than two and three fourths of an inch in diameter and a minimum of seven inches in length. Then this excrement must be frozen to a temperture gelow freezing at its core. Once this state is achieved, it must be inserted rectal to become a frozen mike.
i.e.
"Man, that frozen mike I gave my girl last was not five inhes!!!"
"You know fiber really helped my man's frozen mike!!!"
Frozen Mike by Smokey The DOG October 21, 2008

Mike Jones 

A Mike Jones is a person who sings and or raps saying their name 2 times every 5 seconds, ammounting to high stress levels to whos ears this "sound" may reach
Who? Mike Jones
my name is Mike Jones
i like to rap Mike Jones
Mike Mike Jones who mike jones
Mike Jones by Matt from PV PA April 15, 2006