Closet Rembrandt

The act of forced defecation on a vertical surface, usually in a closet or pantry.

That party was so lame I had the chance to slip into their parent's bedroom and leave a closet Rembrandt.

by piGGman March 16, 2021

Closet Lay

when a person still isn't out of the closet but still has sexual intercourse with the same gender

" Joseph is such a Closet Lay , he had a one night stand with Joe but still isn't out yet"

by sexyboisex September 25, 2019

closet bromosexual

Any person who is in the process of becoming a bro by completing bro trials or other equal feats to achieve the title of "bro". I.e, someone who wants to be a bro but is incapable at the moment. These people might be:

1. Nerds
2. Girls
3. People over the age of 27

Bro 1: Bro, that nerd is starting to bulk up.

Bro 2: Yeah man, I think I saw him at the gym the other. With out his books!

Bro 1: Dude, he's totes a closet bromosexual.

Bro 1: Dude my friend Emily is totes one of the guys, she even hooked me up with her hot friend!

Bro 2: Nice bro, that's one of the biggest bro trials to complete. She is such a closet bromosexual!

by AkRaptorJesus November 28, 2011

closet juggalette

a juggalette who is quiet about being a juggalette. these girls are still true to their family and always has their backs. Based on all their personality and how they act with friends. You'll never truly know if they are until they tell you.

That girl is such a closet juggalette, after talking to her about her views on things.

by Holly Matkoroni April 20, 2011

Closet Drowning

When you are in the closet (talking about your sexuality) and you have been in there so long that you're drowning in all the cum from your countless masturbations because your too alone to have sex with anyone/anything else.

Person 1: Yo, Sam has got to come out the closet soon, everyone know it
Person 2: Yeah, at this rate he'll start closet drowning

by BlackJayd November 27, 2017

Closet Monkey

A gay black man.

That dude James keeps eyeing other dudes... he's such a closet Closet Monkey!

by Blegh the big Dicker October 10, 2022

closet multitasking

Closet multitasking is when you show up for remote meetings pretending to be in attendance but really working on something else.

Bob: Did you hear in the staff meeting that no one can take vacation in February?
Jane: No. Did Fred say that?
Bob: Absolutely. What were you closet multitasking?

The Boss: Jim, How are sales doing?
Me: crickets - no reply
The Boss: WTF, Jim? You closet multitasking?

by jfburke619 January 26, 2021