flex tape is basically the only thing able to keep your ass from tearing during those hot, sweaty nights that you decided that getting butt fucked by Thanos was a good idea. And don’t get me wrong, Thanos will make passionate love to you and will do it well, but not even his gauntlet can stop you from almost getting split into to by his massive purple cock. Only flex tape can.
person 1: my marriage is falling apart. my kids have aids. i’m being evicted in 34 minutes. please god, I can’t do this alone. help. me.
god: sorry bro, i’ve got my hands tied. looks like you’re just—
*an explosion destroys the side of the church. a figure walks through the smoke. it’s phil swift*
phil swift: Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
god: sorry bro, i’ve got my hands tied. looks like you’re just—
*an explosion destroys the side of the church. a figure walks through the smoke. it’s phil swift*
phil swift: Hi, Phil Swift here with Flex Tape! The super-strong waterproof tape! That can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair! Flex tape is no ordinary tape; its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks. Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but Flex Tape grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! Flex Tape is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! Flex Tape is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, Flex Tape keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but Flex Tape comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes. To show the power of Flex Tape, I sawed this boat in half! And repaired it with only Flex Tape! Not only does Flex Tape’s powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong water tight seal, so the inside is completly dry! Yee-doggy! Just cut, peel, stick and seal! Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
by depressed as actual f u c k February 22, 2019
Get the Flex Tape mug.by mollymae26 July 23, 2019
Get the Flex mug.Related Words
Filex
• filexican
• Flex
• Flex Tape
• filet mignon
• file
• Flex Nuts
• Filet O'Fish
• flexer
• Flex offender
by Potatoepatches August 26, 2019
Get the Flex tape mug.The super strong waterproof tape that can instantly patch, bond, seal, and repair. This is no ordinary tape. Its triple thick adhesive virtually welds itself to the surface, instantly stopping the toughest leaks.
Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but it grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Its powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! It is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! It is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, it keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but it comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes.
Leaky pipes can cause major damage, but it grips on tight and bonds instantly! Plus, Its powerful adhesive is so strong, it even works underwater! Now you can repair leaks in pools and spas in water without draining them! It is perfect for marine, campers and RVs! It is super strong, and once it's on, it holds on tight! And for emergency auto repair, it keeps its grip, even in the toughest conditions! Big storms can cause big damage, but it comes super wide, so you can easily patch large holes.
by MeinKraft August 29, 2019
Get the Flex Tape mug.by Meme Describer September 3, 2019
Get the flex tape mug.A portmanteau neologism of "flexible" and "deceptive". Its use is as an abstraction away from deceptive, which in itself is a flexible and tricky word in English. Instead of making the usage of "deceptive" more explicit, it emphasizes the vagueness of the word.
If needing to combine flexibly and deceptively, it becomes "flexceptively".
No relation to the similarly named "flexception".
If needing to combine flexibly and deceptively, it becomes "flexceptively".
No relation to the similarly named "flexception".
"Deceptively simple" can mean both more simple than it appears and less simple than it appears; a pretty flexceptive phrase.
All the best double-agents are flexceptive AF.
That series of statutes is so flexceptive it will need a whole new branch of Law and generations of litigators just to understand the true intent, let alone enforce it.
All the best double-agents are flexceptive AF.
That series of statutes is so flexceptive it will need a whole new branch of Law and generations of litigators just to understand the true intent, let alone enforce it.
by pogeddaboudit September 5, 2019
Get the flexceptive mug.When someone is flaunting, bragging. You see a lot of celebrities do that and probably rude girls in school. If someone does this often enough they’re a flexor
Becky: Well, yesterday my Dad bought me a yacht and bought me a car, it was a Lamborghini
John: Becky stop flexing,no one likes flexors
John: Becky stop flexing,no one likes flexors
by Personbehindscreen5 June 20, 2019
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