Crumpet Mayhem

A joyous occasion when six or more crumpets are prepared per person. Preferably buttered, hot and crispy (maybe with a little grilled sugar). This is usually the result of somebody suggesting Crumpet Mayhem (usually due to an over-abundance of crumpets due to them being on special offer). The crumpets are consumed by all and enjoyed, as crumpets are loved by all.
"I'm hungry, anybody got any ideas for a good munchies?"...

..."What about Crumpet Mayhem! We got loads of crumpets and butter because they were half price, we could even sprinkle sugar on top?"...

..."Sounds great, let's get the grill on!"
by MikeSynonymous February 12, 2010
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Rusty Crumpet

Descriptive term for female genitalia that displays the signs of a severe herpes outbreak.
that chick was smokin hot, luckily i got a glimpse of her rusty crumpet and bolted
by Miniskip January 24, 2013
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Crumpet Teeth

When someones teeth has unusual staining on them. Staining similar to the color of a crumpet or english muffin such as: off white, yellow, orange, brown or even hints of black.
He was totally cute until he smiled, it was a serious crumpet teeth situation. Brown with hints of yellow, it reminded me of a toasted english muffin. Gross!
by No Internal Monologue August 20, 2010
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Blended crumpet

He was very blended crumpet
by Blended September 01, 2020
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crumpet cock

A cock eating English man "Crumpet Cock"
"You my friend should stop being a crumpet cock. "
by Trilliam_180 November 16, 2016
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Satay Crumpet

We ran outta bog roll so I had to make a satay crumpet
by Rusty ranga August 08, 2019
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Dusty crumpet

A dusty little fucker who has problems like a box of old ass crumpets
by Pew.pew.pew.alpaca April 24, 2016
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