wank couch

A couch you should never ever sit on. Smells a bit musty and tacky to the touch.

This is the wank couch, I'd sit somewhere else if I were you.

by Camo Clown February 16, 2017

two guys and a couch

Two guys who arent gay but blow eachother while doing a podcast on the couch

Thomas and Pete were two guys and a couch doing a podcast

by Stephchiohey September 19, 2017

couch eye

Bluish discoloration of one eye after being forced to sleep on the couch, after a disagreement

Yo man, did you get in a fight with you woman, looks like you got a bad case of the couch eye

by chloe blowy June 11, 2012

prostitue couch

A couch you pay to sit on every time you need to just like a prostitue

My legs hurt can i barrow 20 bucks for the prostitue couch

by Sketchy sketch123 December 31, 2020

Couch crotch

When your genitals develop a smelly smell after prolonged couch sitting. Usually from build up of sweat from sitting too long and/or persitant need of showering.

I spent the day off playing video games and my girlfriend wont have sex with me because I have couch crotch.

I really need to shower, I have some serious couch crotch.

by Lilbritt October 22, 2018

Couch Creature

A person who spends 95% or more of their time on the couch....They eat on the couch...Sleep on the couch...And play video games either on the Phone or TV ....on the couch...they refuse to use sheets...the fact is the only time one of these people will get up off of the couch is to use the restroom (Hopefully) or to secure food, only to bring it back to the couch to eat it......Showers are very rare and usually in the very early AM hours. Getting rid of one can be tricky and should be well thought out.

Bill: "Dude , Jimmy has been living at our house for 2 weeks since his girl friend tossed him out."
Dude " Yeah and hes starting to smell, hasn't paid for anything, and he hasn't left the house once."
Bill " Left the house, Dude he hasn't gotten off the fucking couch....hes become some sort of Couch Creature.
Dude " I was thinking of lighting the couch on fire to see if he responds."
Bill " Yeah I think its our only hope"

by Stains and Smears May 22, 2019

Couch-Snatcher

The person your crush makes out with on a couch. These people are usually complete assholes and don't deserve your crush's attention. Common treatment for this problem is a punch to the face. Be sure to enlist the help of several bigger and stronger people.

"I was going to ask her out this weekend, but that goddamn couch-snatcher got her first."

by chessapphire1214 January 14, 2009