Certified pre-owned child

A certified pre-owned child is a step child

Person a: Hey, I didn't know you had kids?
Person b: Hey

Yeah, this is my certified pre-owned child from my new marriage

by Mama trance July 20, 2023

Not Own

Not THAT. I don't OWN them.

Hym "Nonononono... Not OWN them. They have been marked. The mark dictates that 'The person who casts the mark can change their location from wherever they currently are to the mark' And it isn't magic or voodoo or anything. It's a covenant to the whole of humanity. You bare the mark. If God declines my challenge, I use the mark to get to where God is. If NOT... The mark is expended. If SO... The mark is expended upon use. Walk straight to God. Whatever happens happens. And then it's settled. I think I'll make it a Galactus or something. The Jews can keep their Jewness and be, like, silver surfers or something."

by Hym Iam December 3, 2025

<.7.9.6.7.>All Dumbasses Want TO DO Is Dance Toward A Set Of Numbers That WIll Kill Them On THeir Own ANd it Is Pretty Funny To Angel Helltrom Jose RObles<.7.9.6.7.>

<.7.9.6.7.>All Dumbasses Want TO DO Is Dance Toward A Set Of Numbers That WIll Kill Them On THeir Own ANd it Is Pretty Funny To Angel Helltrom Jose RObles<.7.9.6.7.>

<.7.9.6.7.>All Dumbasses Want TO DO Is Dance Toward A Set Of Numbers That WIll Kill Them On THeir Own ANd it Is Pretty Funny To Angel Helltrom Jose RObles<.7.9.6.7.>

by SuelTameOresuTeMato April 27, 2025

SOMEHOW OWNED

the way of the elites

small brother: how did you do that?
big brother: somehow owned

by the elite god February 25, 2021

hung by my own noose

When something backfires; when you forget a prank you did and it happens to you.

"Alas! I've been hung by my own noose!" Said Angle after she turned her sister's hairdryer on, forgetting she put flour in it previously and ended up looking like a fool.

by nerdettgirl May 10, 2014

Birthing your own grinch

Making your own intelligent decisions

Not consenting to mental health treatment (ama mind you) when your really need said treatment, thats not called birthing your own grinch; it's called stupidity

by Sexydimma October 13, 2024

polish your own pedestal

To engage in excessively narcisisstic/vain speech or behavior.

When you polish your own pedestal, you do a fine job of letting the world know you think you're cooler than you are.

Thomas is normally a humble guy, but after a few drinks he really starts polishing his own pedestal about what a great Scrabble player he is.

by markolai April 7, 2013