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masturbate

To sooth the shaft. To calm the shaft. The act of one's self meditating and endulging the shaft. Commonly done in front of your grandma. Often robots will struggle to find similar stimulation, unless enough OIL is provided. Make sure your grandma sees however, otherwise process will not work. Your shaft will not work.
"yo bro pp work does yours?"

"dude no what the frick? shaft cam masturbate i try to!"

"grandma room she in is?"

"no course of not is she what?!"

"well don't wonder why working it isn't pepe shaft does not fuction?!"
by peepeepoopypoo March 3, 2020
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Masturbate Theater

A TV show that losers watch to beat off to low-cut Victorian corsets and fade-out sex scenes on PBS Masterpiece, formerly known as Masterpiece Theater.
Derek: Are coming down to the bar Sunday night?

Alistair: Nah, I’m gonna lay back and unzip for Jane Austen on Masturbate Theater.
by IGKYA53 July 29, 2020
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native masturbation

When you give an indian burn on your penis with hot sauce.
Hey Cesar, I', going to give myself a native masturbation.
by fuckyourdad101inthea$$ September 30, 2017
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Scottish masturbating

A combination of having an orgasm, taking a shit and puking at the same time.
''Dude, after masturbating on a Scottish way it takes a huge amount of time to clean it up.''
- ''Yeah man, that's the disadvantage of Scottish masturbating!''
by idgafosoae April 12, 2017
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joke masturbation

The act of laughing at or enjoying your own jokes to such an extent to which it may be seen to cause you arousal.
Steve: Don't you find it weird how Dave always laughs at his own jokes? They aren't even funny...

James: Yeah, he's really into joke masturbation.
by MegaP143 May 29, 2017
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blindfold masturbation

A situation in which people put on blindfolds and masturbate people they cannot see.
The teacher lead a blindfold masturbation session with his students.
by 66991234 December 3, 2017
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Keema & Masturbate Day

When Steak & Blowjob day goes horribly wrong...
Adam - "Did you get Steak & Blowjob last night?"

Tom - "No, I had Keema & Masturbate Day, unfortunately."
by Safali July 25, 2016
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