Couch Creature

A person who spends 95% or more of their time on the couch....They eat on the couch...Sleep on the couch...And play video games either on the Phone or TV ....on the couch...they refuse to use sheets...the fact is the only time one of these people will get up off of the couch is to use the restroom (Hopefully) or to secure food, only to bring it back to the couch to eat it......Showers are very rare and usually in the very early AM hours. Getting rid of one can be tricky and should be well thought out.

Bill: "Dude , Jimmy has been living at our house for 2 weeks since his girl friend tossed him out."
Dude " Yeah and hes starting to smell, hasn't paid for anything, and he hasn't left the house once."
Bill " Left the house, Dude he hasn't gotten off the fucking couch....hes become some sort of Couch Creature.
Dude " I was thinking of lighting the couch on fire to see if he responds."
Bill " Yeah I think its our only hope"

by Stains and Smears May 21, 2019

couch eye

Bluish discoloration of one eye after being forced to sleep on the couch, after a disagreement

Yo man, did you get in a fight with you woman, looks like you got a bad case of the couch eye

by chloe blowy December 17, 2012

The Couch Shitters

People who sit on the fucking couch and were too fucking lazy to stand up get to the bathroom to unload their fucking crap

John: Hey Carl, Imma take a shit on the couch

Carl: Seems lit, imma take one too

Joe: Same here, are we The Couch Shitters?

by Thy Custodian April 7, 2024

couch coin

When a person puts their hands into the cushions of their couch and is surprised to find pieces of shit layered in the inside these are probably left by a hoard of fuckboys that were not under proper control of the fuckboys supreme

Damn, yo these fuckn couch coins keep get'n my hands ahl covered in shit

by Blackman in a chef hat October 6, 2015

mini couch fucker

Not unlike a couch fucker; however, the individual prefers intercourse with smaller couches.

Hey mini couch fucker! Try this one on for size!

by Burritowang May 14, 2016

Couch Potato-ness

The act of sitting on the couch and being in such a state that even theories regarding cosmology and engaging pastimes, such as fencing, lose their appeal in lieu of induced TV coma, abnormal snacking and fantastically long power naps.

Justin rather enjoys his couch potato-ness, but only on the weekends.

by Webes00 July 23, 2010

Couch Excuse

An excuse that is somewhat valid, but not relevant to the scenario.

That's just a couch excuse!

by dandan8000 November 22, 2024