Michigan Parchment Paper

The act of coating toilet paper in IcyHot. When an unsuspecting person goes to use the ‘parchment paper’, they would be left with a surprise as their asshole constricts from the Icy and burns from the Hot

Eli: “I replaced my toilet paper with Michigan Parchment Paper. My girlfriend has been screaming for the past 2 hours.”

by Jeffica3576 August 19, 2025

Romanian Porch Pirate

A young man with a long scraggly beard who joyfully steals packages from upstanding citizens and dresses in traditional homeless Romanian attire.

Jeff: “Hey man, have you seen Colby lately? He’s wearing 3 jackets and a big ass bogan and it’s 96 degrees outside”

Todd: “Yeah I seen him, he’s a total Romanian Porch Pirate”

by Klansman1867 September 15, 2025

Nigerian perch

To shove a perch (a type of fish) up someone’s ass hole and thrust it until the perch flares its fins and stabs the victims ass hole, acting like a barb

Yo!! Theres a perch stuck up that brat’s ass hole because Lightning M’coon gave him a nigerian perch!!!

by Darkening m’coon December 4, 2025

Cock porch

Big gut over hanging someone's dick

Check out the cock porch on Wayne. He really let himself go.

by Jabroni272 January 6, 2026

Sail the porch

To spend long periods of time on one's front porch. Usually involves music, conversation and some form of inebriates. May also involve food, especially food produced from a grill.

I'm just planning to sail the porch tonight, you can come hang, too.

by tehamahreha February 28, 2009

sweep the porch

To brush away lint, crumbs, dandruff, etc. away from the pubic hair of an individual prior to performing oral sex.

She was fine as fuck, but if you gotta sweep the porch to get in, you probably don't wanna go inside anyway.

by pbrdrunk January 10, 2017

playing on the porch

A form of ass play with no penetration of thy tongue, finger, or other devices. It’s simply playing on the porch. One might think of it as a type of rim job Ringing the doorbell is allowed and encouraged. If no one answers, you may resort to knocking.

Jon: Yo Ben, you smash this weekend?
Ben: Nah me n’ my girl were just playing on the porch instead

by JakeyJakey January 28, 2018