Closet Monkey

A gay black man.

That dude James keeps eyeing other dudes... he's such a closet Closet Monkey!

by Blegh the big Dicker October 10, 2022

Closet Republican

The kinda guy who lives on the East or West coast (usually high income) and reluctantly votes for the Republicans mostly because he doesn’t want to pay the Democrat’s proposed taxes. He often goes to great lengths to appease his liberal friends in conversation and not let them know who he voted for.

“That guy is such a closet Republican, there’s no way he’s pro taxes with a house like that.”
“He’s such an obvious appeaser, like some closet Republican trying to fit in.”

by Henrey S March 21, 2024

Closet Gender

One who's gender identity is yet to be revealed. It's a secret forever.

You want to know my gender? To bad, i'm a closet gender

by analise burner April 30, 2019

closet candy crusher

One who secretly smokes methamphetamine out of hookers buttholes using a special ass bong device. It is like a normal bong except that the bottom is open, allowing the water chamber to be the rectum of said hooker.

Bro: "Yo man I heard Randy is a closet candy crusher. Dude smokes ice out of skank booty."

Bro2: "Damn, I knew I shouldn't have let him borrow my assbong. Oh well YOLO!"

Bro: "Nasty mang, you probably got mouth herpes now."

by the mysterious j September 7, 2013

my bffs closet

Fashion Dope Dealer

Best Prices Around

Place where you go for an awesome shopping experience

Pretty Girls

Those shades came from My Bffs Closet

Did you see the new My Bffs Closet discount code?

Pretty Girls Love My Bffs Closet

by Mbffsc June 18, 2018

glass-closeted

A gay/lesbian person who denies being homosexual and identifies as straight despite being obviously attracted to men.

I hate how Jason is such a glass-closeted person. I know for a fact he likes Mark.

by Pug's Sea February 18, 2025

closet dill popper

A person attending a conference or banquet serving deli products in a multiple course buffet who says that they will only have one course of the meal, because of their "diet," but ends up making that one course the equivalent to the amount of courses that everybody else is eating. This word is only applicable when at an event serving DELI foods.

(two men talking to each other at a banquet)

"Dude, do you know how much deli food that chick at my table is eating?"

"Veronica? Yeah, she's a closet dill popper. She says that she will only eat one course because she is on a 'diet', but she makes that one course 3x bigger than everyone else's.

by Cupcake4U May 15, 2011